Tag: Q n A

Praise be to Allah.The Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) spoke the
truth when he said, I am not leaving behind any fitnah (trial, temptation) more
harmful to men than women. (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 4706).
He
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) also
said: This world is sweet and dazzling, and Allaah has you put in charge of it to
see how you will do and what you will do, so beware of this world and beware of women, for
the first fitnah (temptation, trial) that befell the Children of Israel was concerning
women. (Reported by Muslim, 4925).
You have to deal with two things, one now and one in the
future. As far as your past misbehaviour is concerned, you must repent sincerely to Allaah
right now, and do good deeds to expiate for your bad deeds, as was reported in the hadeeth
of Ibn Masood (may Allaah be pleased with him), who said that a man kissed a woman
[who was unlawful for him]; he came to the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) and told him about it, [saying, I met a woman in the garden, and I
embraced her, touched her and kissed her]. [Here I am, judge concerning me as you
wish.] [He started asking how he could expiate for this, and (the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)) did not say anything]. Then Allaah revealed
the words (interpretation of the meaning): And perform al-salaah at the two ends
of the day and in some hours of the night. Verily, the good deeds remove the evil
deeds [Hood 11:114]. The man asked, O Messenger of Allaah, is this
just for me? He said, It is for all of my ummah (reported by
al-Bukhaari, 495; additional material in brackets is from the reports of al-Tirmidhi,
Ahmad, Muslim and Ibn Maajah, in that order), so do a lot of acts of
worship and good deeds, so that Allaah may accept your repentance.
As far as the future is concerned, you are not permitted at all to go
to places where there is corruption and free mixing, where you are likely to meet women.
You say that you cannot control yourself, so why do you go to places where you spend time
chatting informally with women, and then say that you cannot resist? What you say is
completely unacceptable. If you avoid the places and things that lead to evil, and do not
expose yourself to it, you will protect yourself from falling into sin. Fear Allaah, for
Allaah is watching you to see how you will do and what you will do. Beware of going to
places that will lead you into haraam things. Remember that the more you indulge in haraam
activities, the more difficult it is to retreat, so nip it in the bud. Stick to righteous
company, and keep away from evil things and evil people. Do everything that will help you
to remain chaste, such as hastening to marry and lowering your gaze. I ask Allaah to
protect you from the temptation of women. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.

Praise be to Allah.It is regrettable indeed that anyone would fail to adhere to the
religion which Allaah has commanded us to adhere to. What is even more distressing is the
fact that a Muslim woman would have a relationship (of any kind) with a non-related
Christian man for ten years, when she knows that this is something which angers Allaah,
Who has forbidden believing women to do such things in the Quran (interpretation of
the meaning): they should be chaste, not adulterous, nor taking
boyfriends [al-Nisaa 4:25]. Equally upsetting is the fact that what
this Muslim girls father fears most with regard to the marriage described
is not Allaah, but what his mother will say and how his reputation among his
relatives will be affected.
In any case, there is no way out of this problem now except one: this
man must become Muslim in a real sense, and start to practise Islam, and he and this girl
should repent for what they have done. Then marrying him will be permissible, and what
people may say does not matter, so long as everything is done in accordance with Islam and
in a way that will not earn the anger of Allaah; the matter can also be explained to close
relatives. If this is not possible, then the relationship with this man should be cut
completely, and all thought of him should be dismissed from ones mind. If, my
sister, you feel that there is some harshness in this answer, then by Allaah it is only in
your best interests and out of concern for you. We ask Allaah to accept our repentance and
have mercy on us, for He is the One Who accepts repentance and is All-Merciful.

Praise be to Allah.
There is no mention in the question of the reason for the differences between you but, in any
case, you should avoid contact with each other as much as possible, and both of you should
occupy yourselves with useful things like worship, study of Islaam, etc. There are many
brothers and sisters who have experienced similar problems, and when they have distanced
themselves from one another, a spirit of love and friendship has returned. You both need to
equip yourselves with patience, calmness and tolerance of one another’s mistakes, until Allaah
brings about the marriag of either or both of you. It is the nature of life that you will part one
day, so let it be on good terms. We ask Allaah to guide you both, to reconcile you and to put
friendship and love in your hearts. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad
.

Praise be to Allah.I mentioned some of the topics you referred to in a book entitled “ad-Dalil ila Maraji
al-Mawduat al-Islamiyyah” which also included references for such topics. The said book
comes in 3 volumes of which only Volume 1 has been issued. Volumes 2 and 3 are being
printed and will soon be made available by Dar al-Watan for Publishing, Riyadh. Other topics
have been included in recorded lectures, teaching sessions and Islamic topics. Other topics
need to be discussed and included.
I ask Allah to help us all serve His religion and the call to His way.

Praise be to Allah.You should pray to Allaah to make his weaning easy. There is no specific duaa for this particular matter, but it is OK to recite general duaas.
Among the duaas for children narrated in the Quraan are:

What the wife of Imraan said when she gave birth to Maryam (interpretation of the meaning):

Wa innee ueedhuhaa bika wa dhurriyyatahaa min ash-Shaytaan ir-rajeem (I seek refuge with You (Allaah) for her and for her offspring from Shaytaan, the outcast). [Aal Imraan 3:36],
and what the believer said (interpretation of the meaning):
wa aslih li fi dhurriyyati (and make my offspring good) [al-Ahqaaf 46:15].
The words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him):
Ueedhuka bi kalimaat Illaahit-taammah min kulli shaytaanin wa haammah wa min kulli aynin laammah (I seek refuge for you in the perfect words of Allaah from every devil and every vermin, and from every bad eye)
and:
Allaahumma innee asaluka al-afu wal-aafiyah fi ahli wa maali (O Allaah, I ask you for forgiveness and good health and protection with regard to my family and my wealth).
It is also OK to make duaa by yourself with regard to this matter, such as saying, O Allaah, provide him with blessed food, hasten good nourishment for him and make his weaning easy, and make him independent by Your grace and mercy, and so on.
You should also consult with doctors and seek their help you may find that they can give you some good advice. May Allaah help you to do all that is good.

Praise be to Allah.Your problem is a sensitive and serious problem that has to do with
adhering to Islam and following its rules. Whilst we understand your problem and feel your
suffering from afar, we want to remind you of the following points:
Firstly, this something that you say comes to you and tells
you that you have to be a Muslim could be one of the angels, because the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: The Shaytaan has some hold over
the son of Adam and the angel has some hold over the son of Adam. As for the hold of the
shaytaan, it is reminding him of evil and disbelieving the truth. As for the hold of the
angel, it is reminding him of goodness and believing the truth. Whoever find the latter,
let him know that it is from Allaah, so let him praise Allaah. Whoever finds the former,
let him seek refuge with Allaah from the accursed Shaytaan. Then he recited
(interpretation of the meaning): Shaytaan (Satan) threatens you with poverty and
orders you to commit Fahsha (evil deeds, illegal sexual intercourse, sins); whereas Allaah
promises you forgiveness from Himself and bounty [al-Baqarah 2:268].
(Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 2914; he said it is a ghareeb hasan hadeeth).
Shaytaan here refers to Iblees or one of his troops.
A hold (literally, touch) means coming close and having an effect. Here it
refers to what happens in the heart as a result of the influence of the devil or angel.
Reminding him of evil such as Kufr (disbelief), immorality and wrongdoing.
Disbelieving the truth means denying the rights of Allaah or the rights of
creation, or denying something that has been proven to be truesuch as Tawheed,
Prophethood, Resurrection, the Day of Judgement and Paradise and Hell. As for the
hold of the angel, it is reminding him of goodness such as prayer and fasting.
And believing in the truth such as the Books and Messengers of Allaah.
Whoever finds that means in himself, or notices or recognizes it, i.e., the
hold of the angel. Let him know that it is from Allaah means it is a great
blessing and wonderful mercy that has come to him because Allaah commanded the angel to
touch him. Let him praise Allaah for this great blessing, because it has
qualified him to be guided by the angel to this goodness. Whoever finds the
former means the hold of shaytaan. Then he recited means the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) he quoted the aayah (interpretation of
the meaning): Shaytaan (Satan) threatens you with poverty means he
scares you with it to stop you spending in good ways. and orders you to commit
Fahsha (evil deeds, etc.) means sins.
In the light of this great hadeeth, you can now understand your
situation. The something that is bringing you goodness is bringing you a
blessing from Allaah, so give thanks and praise to Allaah for it. The other one who is
coming to entice you to go out and dance and form illicit relationships with evil, dirty
people is from the Shaytaan, so seek refuge with Allaah from that every time he tempts you
with these evil dangers.
Secondly, do not worry about there being so many lost souls around you,
do not let these hordes of kaafirs who are drowning in the sea of their reckless desires
and sins distract you from the purpose for which you were created. Allaah says
(interpretation of the meaning):
And if you obey most of those on the earth, they will mislead
you far away from Allaahs path (al-Anaam 6:116)
And most of mankind will not believe even if you desire it
eagerly (Yoosuf 12:103)
O young Muslim woman, what is the value of life if a person lives only
to follow his or her own desires, steeped in vice, dancing and singing, getting drunk and
causing uproar, engaging in illicit sexual conduct and behaving like an animal? Allaah
says (interpretation of the meaning):
They are like cattle, nay even more astray; those! They are
the heedless ones (al-Anaam 6:179).
Thirdly, as you are living in a negative atmosphere filled with so many
kuffaar and Muslims who do not adhere to their religion and who may not know anything
about Islam other than its name, and surrounded with trials and temptations as you are,
you have to cling to Allaah and adhere to His shareeah (laws), turn to Him and pray
always to Him to protect you from sin and help you to adhere to your religion. Always
repeat this duaa: Yaa muqallib al-quloob thabbit qalbi ala deenak
(O Controller of the hearts, make my heart adhere firmly to Your religion). Because
your mother, the Mother of the Believers Aaishah (may Allaah be pleased with
her) narrated from her husband, your Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) that he used to recite this duaa (Yaa muqallib al-quloob
thabbit qalbi ala deenak) frequently. She asked, O Messenger of Allaah, we
believe in you and in what you have brought. Do you fear for us? He said, Yes,
for peoples hearts are between the fingers of Allaah and He turns them as He
wills. (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2066. He said, this is a hasan hadeeth).
Fourthly, try to look for other Muslim women so that you can remind one
another of the truth and encourage one another to be patient. Do whatever you can to call
your parents to the way of truth, for how many young people have been the cause of their
elders being guided!
Finally we ask Allaah to guide you in the ways of peace and to make you
steadfast on the path of Islam and to bless you with the sweetness of faith. We entrust
you to the care of Allaah, for those who are under His care will never be lost.

Praise be to Allah.If what
your wife has recently told you is what really happened, then she has
committed a major sin and an act of clear betrayal by giving in to this
attacker and not trying to escape or stop him or call for help and so
on.  Her claim that she was forced to do it is not acceptable,
because she makes no mention of being threatened with a weapon or being
tied up, etc.  If this is indeed the case, and she clearly did
not try to defend herself, then what should you do and how should you
regard her? 
There
is no doubt that you should warn her and remind her about Allaah and
the Last Day and its horrors, and explain to her the seriousness of
overstepping the limits set by Allaah and betraying one’s spouse. You
should also remind her of the terrible punishment dictated by sharee’ah
for the married person who commits adultery, which is stoning to death. 

After
warning her in this fashion, if you see that she regrets what she did
and is striving to be righteous, there is nothing wrong with staying
with her, and your marriage will still be valid.  It seems most
likely that this woman is indeed sorry for what she did and has repented,
because she is the one who has brought up the subject after it had been
forgotten, and she has told you about it. Perhaps this is because of
her guilty conscience and sincere desire to seek forgiveness from her
husband.  The sin that she committed when she was very young and
living in the ignorant environment of America, and where she may have
resisted at the beginning of the attack, then softened, is nothing like
the sin of a woman who goes out of her way to commit it, and plans to
do it deliberately. Our advice is that if this woman is now righteous
and truly regrets what she did, then you should forgive her, especially
as you may by now have children who will suffer if you divorce her. 
At the same time, you should continue to teach her, keep an eye on her
and not stay away from her for too long.  We ask Allaah to acceptance
repentance from us all.
 Finally,
I want to address a serious matter that you refer to in the second part
of your question, which is the fact that you say you no longer want
to go to the mosque or pray or make du’aa’, because of the crisis that
you are facing.  This is very strange, for whenever the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) was faced with a serious matter he would turn to prayer
and ask Allaah to help him, and he taught us to do likewise. We should
not turn away from the houses of Allaah (mosques) or stop praying and
making du’aa’. Where else can you turn in times of trouble and who else
can you ask for protection in this crisis? Turn back to Allaah, my brother,
ask Him to relieve your distress and seek His help with patience and
prayer, for Allaah is with those who are patient.

Praise be to Allah.Human societies have known all kinds of class systems.
In some societies there is a class of princes, a class of warriors, a class of farmers and
a class of slaves, and based on this there is a lot of oppression, abuse and trampling on
people’s rights. But the sharee’ah or law of Allaah does not recognize such
systems at all. Islam gives equal rights to all, rich and poor, noble and ignoble. The
basic principle on which people are differentiated in Islam is mentioned in the Holy
Qur’aan, in Soorat al-Hujuraat (interpretation of the meaning):
“O mankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and
made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another. Verily, the most
honourable of you with Allaah is that (believer) who has al-taqwa [i.e., is one of the
muttaqoon or pious]. Verily, Allaah is All-Knowing, All-Aware”
[al-Hujuraat 49:13]
The Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “O
people! Verily your Lord is One and your father [Adam] is one. An Arab is no better than a
non-Arab, and a non-Arab is no better than an Arab; a red man is no better than a black
man and a black man is no better than a red man – except if it is in terms of taqwa
(piety)…” (Reported by Imaam Ahmad, 22391; al-Silsilat al-Saheeh,
2700).
This is the principle on which society is based in
Islam. This is the global human society which mankind is trying to attain through its
far-fetched ideas, but is failing to do so, because they are not following the one
straight path that will lead them there, the way to God, may He be glorified, and because
they are not standing under the one banner that could unite them, the banner of God, may
He be exalted.
People live on this earth connected by all kinds of relationships, all
of which carry some weight or have some attraction in their lives… these include
lineage, power, wealth, etc. From these stem other connections, practical, economic, etc.,
where people have different positions and levels of status with regard to one another. So
some people have more status than others in worldly terms… Then Islam comes and says:
“the most honourable of you with Allaah [God] is that (believer) who has al-taqwa
[i.e., is one of the muttaqoon or pious]” so it ignores all the values that carry
weight in people’s lives, and replaces them all with this new value that is derived
directly from the Revelation and is the only one that is recognized in the standards of
God. This is piety and consciousness of God, which is manifested in the worship of God
lone, with no partner, no son, no equal… obeying what He commands and avoiding what
He forbids, seeking His pleasure and Paradise, and fearing His punishment and Hell-fire.
Allaah is All-Seer of His slaves.

Praise be to Allah.If this woman has mended her ways and has repented to
Allaah and has given up haraam things and going out with men, and there are no reasons to
be suspicious about her, then our advice is that your friend should keep her and conceal
her past mistakes. Whoever conceals a Muslims faults, Allaah will conceal his faults
in this world and the next. Allaah is Forgiving and Merciful, He forgives and accepts the
repentance of the one who turns to Him in repentance. So we should be forgiving and should
treat the one who has repented in accordance with the way he is now, and help him to
continue to repent. The one who has repented is like one who has never sinned at all. If
the husband conceals his wifes past mistakes and treats her well, this will be of
immense benefit in helping this woman adhere to the straight path and encouraging her to
continue living a life of purity and chastity; her husband will also have a great reward
for concealing her faults, keeping her chaste and helping her to avoid evil and stay on
the straight path, living under his care in a pure atmosphere in the marital home.
If this woman is still persisting in mischief and going out with men
and committing haraam actions, and does not repent despite being advised to do so, then we
do not suggest that he should keep her at all. Let him get rid of her and Allaah will
provide him with another wife.
If she has repented, but he cannot bear what she has done in the past,
and he is tormented with bad thoughts that give him sleepless nights, and he is scared
that if he keeps her he may mistreat her even though she has repented, then he can divorce
her so as to give himself peace of mind and avoid mistreating her. But he should look at
the matter anew and think long and hard about the advice we have given here. Let him think
about himself too: maybe he has made mistakes in the past, or will do so in the future. We
ask Allaah to help him to make the right decision and to guide him to the best way. Allaah
is the Source of strength and the Guide to the Straight Path.

Praise be to Allah.If the situation is as you describe, then what can we
say about the immense disaster of a father who does not pray or fast, who drinks
intoxicants and commits immoral acts, who neglects his family and calls them to do evil
deeds? Laa hawla wa laa quwwata illa Billaah; hasbunaa Allaah wa niam al-wakeel;
innaa Lillaahi wa innaa ilayhi raajioon (There is no strength and no power except
with Allaah; sufficient unto us is Allaah and He is the best Disposer of affairs; verily
we belong to Allaah and unto Him we will return). [These are duaas
recited by Muslims when faced with calamity Translator] Does he not
know that Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire
(Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are appointed angels stern (and) severe,
who disobey not (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allaah, but do that which
they are commanded.[al-Tahreem 66:6]
Does he not know that the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) said:
There is no person to whom Allaah has given responsibility and
dies neglecting that responsibility, but Allaah will deny him Paradise. (Reported
by Muslim, 203)
Every one of you is a shepherd and every one of
you is responsible for his flock (those under his care) a man is the shepherd over
the members of his household and he is responsible for them
Allaah will ask every shepherd about that for which
he was responsible. (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 1627).
There is no person to whom Allaah has given
responsibility over others and he failed to take care of them by advising them sincerely,
but he will never smell the fragrance of Paradise. (Reported by al-Bukhaari,
6617).
We ask Allaah to bring this man back to the truth.
Know that even though your father has caused you so much suffering, it
is not permissible for you to sever your ties with him, in spite of all that you have
mentioned. You must keep in touch with him and treat him kindly. You and your siblings
should treat him kindly and express your fears for him and your love for him, because of
his rights as a father, and because severing ties with him and ignoring him in a hostile
manner will only make matters worse. Neither you nor your siblings should obey him in sin.
You mention in your message that your father used to treat you well when you gave him
money, so if giving him money will put an end to his bad treatment and make things go back
to normal, so that you will treat one another well and he will see love and sacrifice on
your part, then why not do that? This is provided that he does not use this money to buy
haraam things. Try to restrain your anger and forget his past shortcomings in his
behaviour towards you. Try to honour him and show love towards him. Visit him and look
after him. Maybe this will stir up true fatherly feelings in him, and maybe stop him from
doing haraam things. Dont even think of severing ties with him. Get in touch with
your brother and ask him to get back in touch with his father. Know that your being
patient with him is a kind of jihaad, which will be rewarded. The idea of not visiting him
until he repents is not right, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):But if they (both) strive with you to make you join in worship with Me others
that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not, but behave with them in the world
kindly, and follow the path of him who turns to Me in repentance and in obedience. Then to
Me will be your return, and I shall tell you what you used to do. [Luqmaan 31:15]
Visit him, so long as it does not cause you unbearable harm or make you
do wrongful things. Know that one of the ways to make a sinner repent is having someone
who will call him to repent and remind him of Allaah. A child has to treat his parents
honourably even if they are mushrikeen. Al-Qurtubi said:
The aayah indicates that one should honour kaafir parents as much
as possible by spending on them if they are poor, by speaking kindly to them, and by
calling them to Islam.
With regard to your sister, she must be careful when she stays with her
immoral father. Locking herself in is a good safety measure and may well be essential at
times. If she does not feel safe in the home of this immoral father, she should go and
live somewhere else where she can be safe, such as in your house, if it is suitable. Maybe
Allaah will give her a righteous husband who will take care of her and protect her.
We ask Allaah to guide your father and to bring him out of darkness
into light. May He forgive you for your sin and help your sister and all of us to adhere
steadfastly to the truth. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.