Tag: Q n A

Praise be to Allah.Undoubtedly man may be afflicted with psychological problems such as worries about the future and grief over the past. Psychological problems affect the body more than physical problems do. We should know that the worries and distress that affect a person are among the things that expiate his sins and reduce the burden of sin; if he is patient and seeks reward with Allaah, he will be rewarded for that. 
Treating these problems in the ways prescribed in Islam is more effective than treating them with physical medicine, as is well known. 
One of the treatments prescribed in Islam is to recite the du’aa’s narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) to relieve worries and distress, for example, the saheeh hadeeth narrated from Ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be pleased with him): “There is no-one who is afflicted by distress and grief, and says: ‘Allaahumma inni ‘abduka ibn ‘abdika ibn amatija naasyati bi yadika, maada fiyya hukmuka, ‘adlun fiyya qadaa’uka. As’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu fi kitaabika aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista’tharta bihi fi ‘ilm il-ghayb ‘indaka an taj’al al-Qur’aana al-‘Azeema rabee’ qalbi wa noor sadri wa jalaa’ huzni wa dhihaab hammi (O Allaah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave, son of Your maidservant; my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every name belonging to You which You have named Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the Unseen with You, that You make the Holy Qur’aan the life of my heart and the light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety),’ but Allaah will take away his distress and grief.” This is one of the remedies prescribed in sharee’ah. One may also say: “Laa ilaaha illa anta, subhaanaka inni kuntu min al-zaalimeen (There is no god but You, glorified (and exalted) are You, truly I have been of the wrongdoers).” [cf. al-Anbiya’ 21:87] 
Another form of treatment is ruqya with which a person may treat himself – which is better. The Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to do ruqyah for himself by reciting al-Mi’wadhatayn (the last two soorahs of the Qur’aan) when he went to sleep, then he would wipe his face and whatever he could of his body. Or a person may go to someone whose religious commitment he trusts to do ruqyah for him. 
If he wants to know more, he can refer to what the scholars have written about du’aa’ such as al-Waabil al-Sayyib by Ibn al-Qayyim, al-Kalim al-Tayyib by Shaykh al-Islam, al-Adhkaar by al-Nawawi, and Zaad al-Ma’aad by Ibn al-Qayyim. 
From the fatwas of al-Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, Kitaab Fataawa Islamiyyah, vol. 4, p. 465-467.

Praise be to Allah.First of all, we would like to congratulate our sister for embracing
Islam, which is the joy for which wealth and souls would be sacrificed, for all the
blessing of Islam makes all grief and distress fade into insignificance.
The sister says that she loves a Muslim man. We say: it is not
appropriate for a Muslim woman to fall into the trap of nonsensical emotions and forbidden
relationships into which others fall. The love which people hear about and read about is
one of the dazzling tricks of the Shaytaan, and it usually happens with regard to things
that Allaah has forbidden. If a man finds that he likes a girl, the only option he has is
to ask her guardian (walee) for permission to marry her.
The mans mothers comment that new Muslims cannot be good
Muslims is false. Were the Sahaabah (may Allaah be pleased with them) anything but new
Muslims, given that prior to their Islam they had been believers in Shirk? Does any
Muslim have any doubts about their commitment to religion and their character? Moreover,
we see that many new Muslims are many times better than many (born) Muslims! Just because
a Muslim is new does not mean that he will never be good, and just because a Muslim is
born in Islam does not mean that he is good. What counts is Taqwa (piety, awareness of
Allaah) and righteous deeds, as well as the length of time one has been in Islam and has
been worshipping Allaah.
There is no reason why knowledge of the man’s marriage should not be
withheld from his parents, especially since this is in the interests of the sister and
there are so few people who can help her to overcome her difficulties. It is the woman who
needs a walee according to shareeah, not the man. However, we would prefer that he
wins his familys approval by convincing them, because this is in their best
interests, benefits which may be lost if they find out that their son concealed his
marriage from them.
The fact that the husband says he wants to call the children to Islam is
good. We ask Allaah to help him to achieve this. The fact that the Hindu father is evil is
sufficient reason for him not to make an open display of his calling the children to
Islam, if that could lead to this kaafir taking the children away by going to the kaafir
courts. You have to act with wisdom in this case.
The woman who is asking this question should not arrange her own
marriage even if she has been previously married, because shareeah does not permit
this. If she does not have a walee as required by shareeah, then her walee may be
the qaadi (judge) or whoever is in charge of the Muslim affairs in her country, such as
the head of the Islamic centre or his deputy.
They especially the sister have to seek the help of Allaah
in dealing with these problems which are giving her sleepless nights. Everyone should know
that whoever puts his trust in Allaah, Allaah will show him a way out. She has to make
duaa sincerely, and he has to try as hard as he can to advise his family and
change their views about new Muslims by showing them real examples of people who are the
opposite of what they think. With regard to the tragedy caused by the former husband, we
advise her again not to make an open display of her calling the children to Islam, lest
that should cause the father to do something that will have bad consequences. If they feel
suspicious about his intentions, there is no harm in calling the police to do whatever is
necessary with regard to him.
If getting married means that the sister will lose her right to custody
of her children, we advise her not to get married now, for fear that these two souls may
end up in Hell in the Hereafter unless she fears that she herself may commit some
immoral action, in which case she should marry the Muslim man whom she has told us about,
with witnesses and a walee as we have stated above. Publicizing the marriage is sunnah,
although it does not have to be announced officially and in writing. But this sister has
to live in a protective Muslim environment and those people will have to know about her
marriage lest she bring upon herself gossip about her honour. If it will be better for her
to leave the place where her ex-husband lives and move to another place where she can be
free, have custody of her children and be able to marry a believing Muslim man who will
protect her and her children, then she should do that.
She has to make duaa and turn to Allaah to relieve her
distress and grief. We pray that Allaah will give her the strength to do that which He
loves and which pleases Him.
And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
The story you tell in your question in and of itself offers a
serious lesson to every girl who follows her whims and desires, fails to
obey Allaah and leaves her family and her home in order to commit sin in an
atmosphere of fitnah. Your question also offers a lesson to every sinner, to
look at the consequences to which their sin may lead them. We ask Allaah to
forgive us, you and every Muslim man and woman. 

With regard to the marriage contract between you and him, if
it was not done in the presence of your guardian and with his approval –
which is what seems to be the case – then it is not valid, and it is haraam
for you to stay with him in this case or to let him be intimate with you,
because he is not your husband. The Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said, “There is no marriage (nikaah) without a guardian
(wali).” And he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Any
woman who gets married without the permission of her guardian, her marriage
is invalid, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid.” 

I advise you to do a number of things: 

1 – You must ask him to put this matter right, by making a
new marriage contract with you, with a mahr (dowry) and the presence of your
guardian and two witnesses. From what you say it seems that your family now
approve of your marriage to him. So there is nothing to prevent you putting
this haraam situation right. If that is not done then he is not your
husband, and it is haraam for you to stay with him. 

2 – I advise you to be patient and to seek reward with Allaah
for the difficulties and stress that you are facing. For these difficulties
will be an expiation for your previous sins. The Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No worry or grief befalls a
believer, not even a thorn that pricks him, but Allaah will expiate thereby
some of his sins.” Your patience will end in a way out, in sha Allah. As the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The way out
comes with patience.” 

3 – Note that unpleasant things only happen to people because
of their sins. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“And whatever of misfortune befalls you, it is because of
what your hands have earned. And He pardons much”

[al-Shoora 42:30]
The difficulties and
unhappiness that you are going through may be a punishment from Allaah for
your disobeying your family and committing this haraam action. But your
regret and putting this matter right, in sha Allaah, will be your
repentance, for the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: “Regret is repentance.” I hope that Allaah will take away from you, as
a result of this repentance, the worry and distress that you are feeling. 
4 – Make a lot of du’aa’
and feel that you are in need of Allaah and have no one else to turn to.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“Is not He (better
than your gods) Who responds to the distressed one, when he calls on Him,
and Who removes the evil…?”[al-Naml 27:62] 
“And your Lord said:
“Invoke Me [i.e. believe in My Oneness (Islamic Monotheism) and ask Me for
anything] I will respond to your (invocation)”[Ghaafir 40:60]
If a person is helped (by
Allaah) to make du’aa’, then his prayer will be answered. Make the most of
the times and places where du’aa’ is answered, such as when prostrating,
before saying the tasleem at the end of the prayer, in the last third of the
night, and on Fridays, especially after ‘Asr prayer. 
5 – You have to advise
your husband and cooperate with him in obeying Allaah. Take him by the hand
and start a new life in which your aim is to please Allaah. May Allaah help
you both to do that which He loves and which pleases Him. And Allaah knows
best.

Praise be to Allah.No doubt your brother is in a state of major crisis, and we ask Allaah to help you to deal with this crisis.
We advise you to be kind and gentle when you deal with him and advise him, because attention must be paid to his condition, just as with all other sick people – whether they are suffering from a disease of the mind or of the body.
You have to do everything you can to stop him from having the drugs and to stop him from meeting the bad friends who are giving or selling him the stuff and thus helping him to do wrong.
You should not give him anything he wants, if you can withhold it from him, until he gives up what he is doing.
We advise you to consult with a specialist doctor who can treat him properly until he gets better and gives up this habit.
If he has young sons or daughters, or brothers and sisters, we suggest that they should also advise him and denounce what he is doing. Perhaps then he will give up because he feels ashamed in front of his children or siblings.
You could describe to him, with the support of other people’s testimonials, how he looks and behaves when he is in an intoxicated state and is out of his mind, so that when he comes back to his senses he will see the evil sin that he has committed.
Do not forget to pray to Allaah to help him to get rid of this habit. Try to make du’aa’ during the last third of the night, and may Allaah show you the way out. We ask Allaah to guide him and to give you patience. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.

Praise be to Allah.
I advise your father and the father of this woman not to
prevent this marriage, so long as there is no shar’i reason to prevent it.
If your brother loves this woman and she loves him, then it is in their
interests to get married. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) said: “There is nothing better for two people who are in love than
marriage,” i.e., if a man loves a woman and she loves him, then let them get
married, and that will calm them down and protect them from doing anything
haraam. Isn’t their getting married better for him, for her and for their
families than their falling into something that Allaah has forbidden? The
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, addressing
the guardians of women, if a man comes to propose marriage: “If there comes
to you one with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased,
then marry (your daughter) to him; if you do not do that then there will be
fitnah (tribulation) and widespread corruption on earth.” 

But if there is a shar’i reason to prevent that, then our
advice to your brother is to obey his father and to remain chaste, and to
strive hard in doing so. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) said: “Whoever strives to be chaste, Allaah will help him to be
chaste,” i.e., whoever does his utmost to be chaste, Allaah will grant him
chastity and help him. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“As for those who strive hard in Us (Our Cause), We will
surely guide them to Our paths (i.e. Allaah’s religion — Islamic
Monotheism)” [al-‘Ankaboot 29:69]
And he should look for
another wife who will help him with his religious commitment and his worldly
interests. 

With regard to witchcraft, if a person regularly reads
Qur’aan and recites the adhkaar that the Prophet (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him) used to recite when going to sleep, when waking up,
in the morning and the evening and at other times and in other
circumstances, then he will protect himself thereby from the accursed
Shaytaan. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“Allaah enjoined five things upon Yahya ibn Zakariyya, which he was to
follow and to enjoin upon the Children of Israel…” then he mentioned them,
among which was: “and He commands you to remember Him. The likeness of that
is of a man who is being pursued by his enemy, until he comes to a strong
fortress where he protects himself from them. Similarly a person cannot
protect himself against the Shaytaan with anything better than the
remembrance of Allaah (dhikr).” 

Al-Mi’wadhaat (soorahs seeking protection with Allaah) are
among the greatest things by means of which a person may protect himself
against witchcraft, so recite them in the morning and in the evening, after
every prayer and before going to sleep. 

Make a lot of du’aa’ for your brother, that Allaah may guide
him and grant him wisdom. And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.The phenomenon of
widespread spinsterhood (women remaining without husbands) is caused by a
number of things, including the following: 

1 – Demanding too high a mahr, and the inability of young men
to bear the expenses of marriage. 

2 – Girls refusing to marry early on the grounds that they
want to complete their education. 

3 – Girls refusing to get married to a man who already has a
wife. 

4 – Difficult conditions imposed by the wife’s family or the
husband’s. 

The ways to solve this problem are as follows: 

1 – The girl’s family should look for a suitable man who can
make their daughter happy, and not seek to make excessive demands with
regard to the mahr. Rather they should look for a man who is religiously
committed and has a good character, who will be able to protect their
daughter’s religious commitment and chastity, and make her happy. 

2 – Girls should not refuse to get married on the excuse that
they want to continue their education, so that they grow old and reach an
age where they can find no one to marry them. It is possible to come to an
agreement with their husbands that they will continue their education after
they get married. That is easy to do, praise be to Allaah. 
3 –  A girl should not regard a man who
proposes marriage to her when he already has a wife as unsuitable for her or
unable to make her happy. Many girls refuse to accept a man who is already
married, then time passes and they get too old and cannot find anyone to
marry them. But Islam and the Sunnah of the Prophet permit a Muslim man to
marry up to four women, on the condition that the man treat all his wives
fairly.

Praise be to Allah.
It is haraam for the wife to ask for a divorce for no
reason, and it is haraam for her to go out of the house for no reason
without her husband’s permission. But if she is being harmed as a result
of staying in her husband’s house or staying married to him, then she has
the right to ask him for a divorce. She has the right to leave the house
and go to her family so that she can escape from her husband’s abuse and
beatings. The husband has to fear Allaah with regard to what Allaah has
put him in charge of. The Prophet urged good treatment of women, and
Allaah commanded His Messenger SAWS (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) to treat people on a reasonable basis. Whatever the case, if the
husband’s abuse is ongoing then she has the right to ask for the marriage
to be annulled, and he has to respond to that request, or he has to repent
to Allaah, and stop harming her.

Praise be to Allah.
This girl has to tell her mother and her brothers so that they can put
a stop to this crime before it happens. The girl must not sit with him
in the place where he is sitting, rather she must keep away from him
even if he is her mahram. The mahram – even if he is a father or brother
– if there is no guarantee that he can be trusted (Allaah forbid), then
it is not permissible to be near him, rather the guardian should prevent
that from happening. If that can only be achieved by punishing or imprisoning
him, then so be it. Whatever the case, this girl has to take every precaution
to prevent this evil from happening.

Praise be to Allah.A young child may steal for a number of reasons:

He steals because he does not know the difference between borrowing and stealing, and the concept of personal ownership is not clear in his mind.

Some children steal because they are deprived of things that others have.

Some steal to take revenge on the parents or to attract their attention.

What do we advise?

Keep calm. Instead of rebuking him and putting him to shame, keep calm. This situation is an opportunity to teach your child.

Advise and exhort the child. Explain to him the Islamic rulings concerning stealing, and tell him that Allaah says in His Book (interpretation of the meaning):

“Cut off (from the wrist joint) the (right) hand of the thief, male or female…” [al-Maa’idah 5:38]
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) accepted the pledge of women, when they made bay’ah (oath of allegiance) to him, that they would not steal, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“… that they will not steal…” [al-Mumtahinah 60:12].
Remind your child that Allaah is always watching. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“He is with you (by His Knowledge) wheresoever you may be” [al-Hadeed 57:4]
And Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“… Allaah is Witness to what you do.” [Aal ‘Imraan 3:98]
Tell him: Allaah can see you even if you steal something in secret, far away from the view of people, because He says (interpretation of the meaning):
“He knows the secret and that which is yet more hidden.” [Ta-Ha 20:7]
Confront the child: you have to confront the child with the reason and motive for stealing. For example, you could say to him, “I know that you took candy from the store, and that you took it because you felt that you needed it, but stealing it was not the answer. Next time, if you want something, talk to me first. I know that you want to be honest.” Try to make the child see how others feel – “If you were in the place of the person whose property was stolen, how would you feel?”
Making the punishment severe, such as making the child return the stolen property and apologizing, or making him pay the value of the item if it has been damaged or used up, whilst also depriving him of some privileges at home.
Supervising the child and not leaving him alone for a long time.
And Allaah is the Guide to the Straight Path.
See: Tanweer al-‘Ibaad bi Turuq al-Ta’aamul ma’a al-Awlaad by Dr. Haamid Nahaar al-Mutayri, p. 37.

Praise be to Allah.The issue of marriage is a personal matter which concerns you alone. You are not responsible for whatever happens between him and his first wife. 
If you have several options, then choose that which is the best. But if you only have the choice between marrying him and remaining single, then I think that marrying him is better.