Category: Ahwal

Praise be to Allah.Islam encourages us to have many children, and the Prophet of Allah Shu’ayb (peace be upon him) reminded (his people) of this blessing and said to them: “And remember when you were but few, and He multiplied you” [al-A’raaf 7:86]. And it was narrated from Ma’qil ibn Yasaar (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Marry those who are loving and fertile, for I will be proud of your great numbers before the nations.” Narrated by Abu Dawood, 2050; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani. See also question no. 13492. 
Being sterilized permanently may mean one of two things: 
1 – It may be done out of necessity, such as if it is determined by trustworthy medicinal evidence that pregnancy will pose a danger to the mother’s life, and there is no hope of a cure, so permanent sterilization will ward off that danger. In this case it is permissible to be sterilized. 
2 – When there is no need for it. Undoubtedly in this case it is a criminal act and a major sin, because it is a transgression against the creation of Allah for no reason, and preventing the production of offspring which was encouraged by the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), and being ungrateful for the blessing of children which Allah bestows upon His creation. 
It says in al-Insaaf: It says in al-Faa’iq: And it is not permissible to do anything that will put a stop to pregnancy. (1/383). 
The Islamic Fiqh Council stated the following in its report no. 39 (1/5): 
It is haraam to sterilize both men and women, if there is no necessary reason for doing so unless there is a necessity which is to be determined according to the guidelines set out by sharee’ah. It is permissible to take temporary measures to space pregnancies or prevent them for a limited period of time, if there is a legitimate shar’i need to do so, so long as this decision is made on the basis of mutual consultation and approval between the spouses. That is subject to the condition that no harm should result from that, and that the means should be acceptable according to sharee’ah, and that there should be no harm caused to an existing pregnancy. End quote. 
Based on this, if your preventing pregnancy is for a legitimate reason as outlined above, then you do not have to do anything. But if it was not for a necessary reason, then you have done something which is haraam, and you have to repent sincerely to Allah and stop taking these injections immediately. If there is anything that will reverse their effect without causing harm, then you must take it.
And Allah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
It states in sharee’ah that the Muslim should not expose
himself to harm. 

That includes mixing with a person who has a contagious
disease, especially if that disease is serious and chronic, such as herpes. 

The rulings of sharee’ah are addressed to everyone, sick and
healthy alike. 

With regard to the one who is sick, Muslim (2221) narrated
from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The owner of
sick camels should not bring them to the healthy ones” – lest the disease be
transmitted to the healthy ones. 

With regard to the one who is healthy, the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Flee from the leper as
you would flee from a lion.” Narrated by Ahmad, 9429; classed as saheeh by
al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 7530. 

Leprosy is a well-known contagious disease – we ask Allaah to
keep us safe and sound. 

Muslim (2231) narrated from ‘Amr ibn al-Shareed that his
father said: Among the delegation from Thaqeef there was a leper. The
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) sent word to him
saying: “We have accepted your oath of allegiance; go back.” 

Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in
Miftaah Daar al-Sa’aadah (2/272): 
He sent word to that
leper accepting his oath of allegiance so as to establish the shar’i
principle of avoiding the causes of harmful and hateful things, because a
person should not expose himself to the causes of harm. 

Ibn al-Qayyim said in Zaad al-Ma’aad (4/147): 
Chapter on the guidance
of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) on avoiding
contagious diseases and his advice to healthy people to avoid those who have
such diseases. Then he quoted the ahaadeeth mentioned above. 

Your wish to marry this man who has herpes may be influenced
by emotion, and you think that you are being patient and forbearing, then if
disaster strikes you will regret it when regret will be of no benefit. There
is nothing to compare to good health. 

Our advice to you is not to marry this person.

We ask Allaah to bless you with a righteous husband who will
help you in your religious affairs. 

And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
It is narrated in al-Bukhaari (5065) and Muslim (3384) that
‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to us: “O young men, whoever among you
can afford to get married, let him do so, for it is more effective in
lowering the gaze and preserving chastity. Whoever cannot afford it, let him
fast, for that will be a shield for him” – i.e., it will reduce and weaken
his desire. 

Based on this, if a person can afford to get married then he
should hasten to do so, because of the many benefits that this brings, as
mentioned by the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him),
namely it helps him to lower his gaze and protect his chastity, increases
the numbers of the ummah and offers protection against temptation and
mischief. 

Ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “If I only
had ten days left to live and I knew that I was going to die on the last of
them, and I could afford to get married, I would get married, for fear of
fitnah (temptation).” 

Imam Ahmad (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “Celibacy has
nothing to do with Islam at all.” 

If you fear hardship for yourself and that you may and fall
into sin, then in that case it is obligatory for you to get married. 

In this case parents are advised to arrange their son’s
marriage and not to stand in the way of his remaining chaste and protecting
himself from temptation. 
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allaah
have mercy on him) said: “With regard to marriage, people fall into three
categories. Some of them fear that they may fall into sin if they do not get
married, in which case it is obligatory to marry, according to the view of
most of the fuqaha’, because this will make a person remain chaste and
protect him from committing haraam actions; the only way to do is to get
married.” 

Al-Mughni, 9/341. 

You have to deal gently and kindly with your parents and try
to convince them of your need to get married, and tell them that this will
never conflict with what they want for you in the future. You can also seek
the help of wise people among your relatives to convince your parents. 

The questioner is to be commended for not going out to places
of fitnah (temptation) and not fulfilling his desires by haraam means. We
ask Allaah to make you steadfast and to help you to find a good wife who
will be a delight to you and your parents, for He is Ever-near and
Responsive.

And Allaah is the Source of strength.

Praise be to Allah.There is nothing wrong with a woman wearing a white wedding dress on condition that she does not appear in it in front of men who are not her mahrams, because usually wedding dresses are adorned and decorated, and we have already stated in the answer to question no. 39570 that one of the conditions of women’s hijab is that it should not be an adornment in and of itself. 
It is also essential that this dress does not reveal any of the woman’s charms, even if she is only going to appear in front of women in it. See question no. 6569 and 34745. 
With regard to it being the dress of kaafir women, that is not the case. Rather many Muslim women nowadays, if not most of them, wear this kind of dress. 
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen was asked: 
What is the ruling on a woman wearing white for her wedding as it is known that this is an imitation of the kuffaar? 
He replied: 
It is permissible for a woman to wear white so long as it is not in the same form as men’s clothing. With regard to it being an imitation of the kuffaar, that is no longer the case, because now all Muslim women wear such clothes when they are getting married. The ruling depends on whether the reason for it is present or not. If it is no longer an imitation of the kuffaar and this has now become something that is common to both Muslims and kaafirs, then the ruling no longer applies, unless something is haraam in and of itself and not because it is an imitation of others. Such things are haraam in all cases. 
Majmoo’at As’ilat tahumm al-Mar’ah, p. 92.

Praise be to Allah.1 – It is not permissible to attend wedding parties that involve evil actions, such as singing that is accompanied by music or that includes indecent words. The fact that this is widespread among people does not mean that it is permissible and should not be denounced. 
2 – Not attending these parties is not regarded as severing the ties of kinship, rather it is protecting oneself from seeing or hearing evil. Your family and relatives should understand that you would be keen to attend and take part, were it not for the evil things that they do. 
3 – If a person who is invited to such an event knows that there will be evil things happening and that he is not able to denounce them, it is not permissible for him to attend. 
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in al-Mughni (7/214): If a person is invited to a wedding feast in which evil things will take place, such as wine, musical instruments, etc, and he is able to attend and remove those evils, then he must attend and denounce them, because then he will be fulfilling two duties: accepting the invitation of his Muslim brother and removing evil. But if he is not able to denounce them then he should not attend. If he does not know about the evils until he gets there, he should remove them. If he cannot, then he should go away. Something similar was stated by al-Shaafa’i. 
It says in Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah: 
If wedding parties are free of evils such as men mixing with women and indecent songs, or if you attend then these evils will be changed, then it is permissible to attend, so as to share in the occasion of joy. Rather it is obligatory to attend if there is some evil that you can remove. 
But if there are evil things in these parties that you cannot denounce, then it is haraam to attend them because of the general meaning of the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): 
“And leave alone those who take their religion as play and amusement, and whom the life of this world has deceived. But remind (them) with it (the Qur’aan) lest a person be given up to destruction for that which he has earned, when he will find for himself no protector or intercessor besides Allaah” [al-An’aam 6:70] 
“And of mankind is he who purchases idle talks (i.e. music, singing) to mislead (men) from the path of Allaah without knowledge, and takes it (the path of Allaah, or the Verses of the Qur’aan) by way of mockery. For such there will be a humiliating torment (in the Hell-fire)”
[Luqmaan 31:6]
And because of the many ahaadeeth which condemn singing and musical instruments. 
From Fataawa al-Mar’ah, compiled by Muhammad al-Musnad, p. 92. 
And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) married ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) after he married Sawdah bint Zam’ah (may Allah be pleased with her). She – ‘Aa’ishah – was the only virgin whom he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) married. And he consummated the marriage with her when she was nine years old. 
Among her virtues was the fact that the Revelation did not descend when he under one cover with any of his wives other than her. She was one of the dearest of all people to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), and news of her innocence was revealed from above the seven heavens. She was one of the most knowledgeable of his wives, and one of the most knowledgeable women of the ummah as a whole. The senior companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to refer to her opinion and consult her. 
With regard to the story of her marriage, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) had grieved over the death of the Mother of the Believers Khadeejah, who had supported him and stood by his side, and he called the year in which she died The Year of Sorrow. Then he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) married Sawdah, who was an older woman and was not very beautiful; rather he married her to console her after her husband had died and she stayed among mushrik people. Four years later the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) married ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her), and he was over fifty. Perhaps the reasons for the marriage were as follows: 
1 – He saw a dream about marrying her. It is proven in al-Bukhaari from the hadeeth of ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said to her: “You were shown to me twice in a dream. I saw that you were wrapped in a piece of silk, and it was said, ‘This is your wife.’ I uncovered her and saw that it was you. I said, ‘If this is from Allah then it will come to pass.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, no. 3682). As to whether this is a prophetic vision as it appears to be, or a regular dream that may be subject to interpretation, there was a difference of opinion among the scholars, as mentioned by al-Haafiz in Fath al-Baari, 9/181. 
2 – The characteristics of intelligence and smartness that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) had noticed in ‘Aa’ishah even as a small child, so he wanted to marry her so that she would be more able than others to transmit reports of what he did and said. In fact, as stated above, she was a reference point for the Sahaabah (may Allah be pleased with them) with regard to their affairs and rulings. 
3 – The love of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) for her father Abu Bakr (may Allah be pleased with him), and the persecution that Abu Bakr (may Allah be pleased with him) had suffered for the sake of the call of truth, which he bore with patience. He was the strongest of people in faith and the most sincere in certain faith, after the Prophets. 
It may be noted that among his wives were those who were young and old, the daughter of his sworn enemy, the daughter of his closest friend. One of them occupied herself with raising orphans, another distinguished herself  from others by fasting and praying qiyaam a great deal… They represented all kinds of people, through whom the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was able to set out a way for the Muslims showing how to deal properly with all kinds of people. [See al-Seerah al-Nabawiyyah fi Daw’ al-Masaadir al-Asliyyah, p. 711]. 
With regard to the issue of her being young and your being confused about that, you should note that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) grew up in a hot country, the Arabian Peninsula. Usually in hot countries adolescence comes early and people marry early. This is how the people of Arabia were until recently. Moreover, women vary greatly in their development and their physical readiness for marriage. 
If you think – may Allah guide you – that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) did not marry any virgin other than ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her), and that all his other wives had been previously married, this will refute the notion spread by many hostile sources, that the basic motive behind the Prophet’s marriages was physical desire and enjoyment of women, because if that was his intention he would have chosen only those who were virgins and beautiful etc.    
Such slanders against the Prophet of Mercy (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) by kaafirs and others of their ilk, are indicative of their inability to find fault with the law and religion that he brought from Allah, so they try to find ways to criticize Islam with regard to issues that are not related to sharee’ah. 
And Allah is the Source of strength. May Allah send blessings and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions. 
For more information see Zaad al-Ma’aad, 1/106.

Praise be to Allah.Blessings of having children
Abu Dawud (2050) narrated that Ma’qil ibn Yasar said: A man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and said, “I have found a woman who is of good lineage and is beautiful, but she does not bear children. Should I marry her?” He said, “No.” Then he came again with the same question and he told him not to marry her. Then he came a third time with the same question and he said: “Marry those who are loving and fertile, for I will be proud of your great numbers before the other nations.” (Classed as sahih by al-Albani in Irwa al-Ghalil, 1784). 
This hadith indicates that it is encouraged to marry women who are fertile, so that the numbers of the ummah will increase, and so the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) will feel proud of his ummah before all other nations. This shows that it is encouraged to have a lot of children. 
Will you be rewarded for having children?
Al-Ghazali said that when a man gets married, intending thereby to have children , that this is an act of worship for which he will be rewarded because of his good intention. He explained that in several ways: 

This is in accordance with what Allah wants, which is to perpetuate the human race. 
Seeking the love of the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) in having many children, so that he will feel proud of them before the other Prophets and nations on the Day of Resurrection. 
Seeking barakah (blessing) and a great deal of reward, and forgiveness of sins through the du`a of a righteous child after one dies. 

Having children was the hope of the Prophets and Messengers
It is well known that since ancient times children have been the hope of the Prophets and Messengers and all of the righteous slaves of Allah, and that will continue to be the case so long as man’s innate nature (fitrah) remains sound. Children are a blessing whom people love and on whom they pin their hopes. 
Ibrahim (peace be upon him) prayed to his Lord, saying (interpretation of the meaning): 
“My Lord! Grant me (offspring) from the righteous” [al-Saffat 37:100]
And Allah says of Zakariyya (peace be upon him) (interpretation of the meaning): 
“When he called out to his Lord (Allah) a call in secret.
He said: ‘My Lord! Indeed my bones have grown feeble, and grey hair has spread on my head, and I have never been unblest in my invocation to You, O my Lord!
And verily, I fear my relatives after me, and my wife is barren. So give me from Yourself an heir.
Who shall inherit me, and inherit (also) the posterity of Ya’qub (Jacob) (inheritance of the religious knowledge and Prophethood, not of wealth). And make him, my Lord, one with whom You are Well-Pleased!’
(Allah said) ‘O Zakariyya (Zachariah)! Verily, We give you the glad tidings of a son, whose name will be Yahya (John). We have given that name to none before (him)’” [Maryam 19:3-7]
Allah praises His righteous slaves in many ways, such as when He said (interpretation of the meaning): 
“And those who say: ‘Our Lord! Bestow on us from our wives and our offspring the comfort of our eyes, and make us leaders of the Muttaqun (the pious)’” [al-Furqan 25:74]
And Allah tells us that Shu’ayb (peace be upon him) commanded his people to remember Allah’s blessing to them when He made them many after they had been few. He said (interpretation of the meaning): 
“And remember when you were but few, and He multiplied you” [al-A’raf 7:86]
He regarded their being multiplied after they had been few as a great blessing which obliged them to obey Allah and obey His Messenger (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him). 
Undoubtedly the benefits of increasing the nation’s offspring are obvious to everyone who thinks about the matter. Hence nations who understand this matter have been keen to encourage their people to increase their numbers and also to make their enemies reduce their numbers by means of specious arguments and sometimes by using means that lead to infertility and having few children, by means of drugs, contaminated food stuffs that reduce fertility and so on. This is one of the means of war used against the Muslim ummah by its enemies. 
We ask Allah to ward off the evil of those who disbelieve and to thwart their plots against the Muslims. 
For more, please see this category: Fiqh of the Family
And Allah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
It is mustahabb to hasten to get married for the one who is
able for it, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“And marry those among you who are single (i.e. a man who
has no wife and the woman who has no husband) and (also marry) the Saalihoon
(pious, fit and capable ones) of your (male) slaves and maid‑servants
(female slaves)”

[al-Noor 24:32]

Ibn Katheer(may Allaah have mercy on him) said, commenting on
this verse: This is a command to marry off those who need to get married. A
number of scholars are of the view that it is obligatory for everyone who is
able for it, and they quoted as evidence the apparent meaning of the words
of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “O young
men, whoever among you can afford to get married, then let him do so, for it
is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding chastity. And whoever is
not able to do that, then let him fast, for that will be a shield for him.”
Narrated in al-Saheehayn from the hadeeth of Ibn Mas’ood. 

In is narrated in al-Sunan via more than one isnaad
that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said: “Marry and produce offspring for I will be proud of your numbers
on the Day of Resurrection.” 

Ayyim (translated here as “single”) refers to the woman who
has no husband or the man who has no wife, whether they were married then
separated or were never married. End quote. 

Secondly: 

The son should tell his father clearly of his wish to get
married, and the father should understand the importance of that, and he
should help his son to get married. Many of the fuqaha’ are of the view that
that is obligatory if he is able for it. 

Ibn Qudaamah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: Our
companions said: The father must keep his son chaste if he is obliged to
spend on him and if he needs to be kept chaste.  This is the view of some of
the companions of al-Shaafa’i. End quote from al-Mughni (8/172). 

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: A
person’s need to get married is urgent, and in some cases it may be like his
need for food and drink. Hence the scholars said: It is obligatory for the
one who has to spend on a person to arrange his marriage if he can afford to
get married, so it is obligatory for fathers to arrange the marriages of
their sons, if the sons needs to get married but cannot afford to do so. But
I heard that some fathers who forget how they were when they were young,
when the sons ask them to arrange their marriage, they say: Get married at
your own expense. This is not permissible and it is haraam if he able to
arrange his marriage. His son will dispute with him on the Day of
Resurrection if he does not arrange his marriage when he is able to do so.
End quote from Majmoo’ Fataawa Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (18/410). 

A widespread mistake is when the father refuses to listen to
his son concerning this matter, and ignores the son’s need. His need for
marriage may be urgent, and as a result of delaying marriage he may fall
into some kind of deviation. It is well known that people vary with regard
to this need and their level of self-control in this matter. The father may
be sinning by preventing his son from getting married if he needs that, as
stated above. 

Some fathers give precedence to study and work over marriage
in all cases, and they never consider arranging their son’s marriage before
that. This is also wrong. Rather they should study the matter and weigh up
the pros and cons. They should find out how much their son needs to get
married, and how able he is to combine marriage and study, and which should
be given priority if it is not possible to do both. Protecting one’s
religious commitment is important, and takes precedence over protecting
one’s physical health and wealth, so naturally it takes precedence over
studying. 

Thirdly: 

The father may be excused for refusing to arrange his son’s
marriage before he completes his studies, either because he sees that the
son is not well-organized in handling his affairs and cannot take
responsibility for himself, let alone anyone else, or he thinks that he is
neglecting his studies and would neglect them even more after marriage, or
he does not think that he really needs to get married, and it is only a
passing fancy or he wants to imitate someone else. The son should excuse his
father and strive to convince him, and explain to him the extent of his need
for marriage and how able he is to take care of his wife after that. 

We ask Allaah to guide you. 

And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.If you fear that you may commit zina (fornication), then you should give priority to marriage over performing the obligatory Hajj and ‘Umrah. But if you do not fear that you may commit zina, then you should give priority to performing the obligatory Hajj and ‘Umrah over marriage. 
And Allaah is the Source of strength.

Praise be to Allah.Firstly: 
It is not
permissible for anyone to forbid that which Allaah has made permissible,
such as women (marriage), food or anything else, because Allaah, may He be
exalted, said:  
“O you
who believe! Make not unlawful the Tayyibaat (all that is good as regards
foods, things, deeds, beliefs, persons) which Allaah has made lawful to you,
and transgress not. Verily, Allaah does not like the transgressors”

[al-Maa’idah 5:87]
Some of the
Sahaabah wanted to be celibate and keep away from women, but the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade them to do that,
and Allaah revealed this verse. 
Ibn Jareer
narrated with his isnaad that Mujaahid (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
Some men, including ‘Uthmaan ibn Maz’oon and ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Amr (may
Allaah be pleased with them) wanted to be celibate, and to castrate
themselves, then this verse was revealed.  
Al-Bukhaari
(5074) and Muslim (1402) narrated that Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqaas (may Allaah be
pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) forbade ‘Uthmaan ibn Maz’oon to be celibate. If he had
given him permission, we would have gotten ourselves castrated.  
Remaining
celibate, getting castrated and regarding women as haraam are all haraam.
This is turning away from the Sunnah of the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him), who got married and encouraged others to
get married. 
Al-Bukhaari
(5063) and Muslim (1401) narrated that Anas ibn Maalik said: Three people
came to the houses of the wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) asking about the worship of the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him). When they were told, it was as if they
regarded it as too little. They said: Who are we in comparison to the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)? Allaah has forgiven his
past and future sins. One of them said: As for me, I will pray all night
forever. Another said: I shall fast all my life and never break my fast.
Another said: I shall keep away from women and never get married. The
Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came and
said: “Are you the ones who said such and such? By Allaah, I am the one who
fears Allaah the most among you and I am the most pious, but I fast and I
break my fast, I pray and I sleep, and I marry women. Whoever turns away
from my Sunnah is not of me.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (5063) and Muslim
(1401).  
Thus is it
clear that no one has the right to forbid women (marriage) to himself. 
Thirdly: 
Whoever has
done that has to repent to Allaah, may He be exalted, and he has to offer
expiation for breaking an oath, because Allaah says (interpretation of the
meaning): 
“O
Prophet! Why do you forbid (for yourself) that which Allaah has allowed to
you, seeking to please your wives? And Allaah is Oft‑Forgiving, Most
Merciful.
2. Allaah
has already ordained for you (O men) the absolution from your oaths”
[al-Tahreem 66:1-2]
Allaah has
described the forbidding of something permissible as an oath. 
See:
al-Sharh al-Mumti’ (10/475). 
The
expiation for breaking an oath is to free a slave, or to feed ten poor
persons with the average kind of food that he gives his own family, or to
clothe them. Whoever cannot do that must fast for three days. 
This has
been explained in detail in the answer to question no.
45676. 
Fourthly:  
The ruling
on marriage varies from one person to another, according to financial and
physical ability and how much a person needs to get married. In some cases
it is obligatory and in others it is mustahabb or makrooh. See question no.
36486. 
And Allaah
knows best.