Q
Their aunt wants to corrupt them; should they cut off ties with her?
The command to uphold the ties of kinship is one of the first
commands that were revealed in Islam. It is indicated in a number of proven
saheeh ahaadeeth, such as the following:
(a)
The story of how ‘Umar ibn ‘Absah became Muslim. He asked the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): With what were you
sent? He (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “He has sent
me to uphold the ties of kinship, to break the idols and to proclaim the
Oneness of Allaah, not associating anything with Him.” Narrated by Muslim
(832).
(b)
The story of Abu Sufyaan and Heraclius when he sent for him
and said: What does he – meaning the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) – enjoin upon you? He said: He enjoins us to pray, give
charity, be chaste and uphold family ties.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (7) and
Muslim (1773).
In many verses Allaah warns us against severing the ties of
kinship, and states that there will be numerous punishments for the one who
does so, which includes incurring the curse of Allaah and a bad end. Allaah
says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And those who break the Covenant of Allaah, after its
ratification, and sever that which Allaah has commanded to be joined (i.e.
they sever the bond of kinship and are not good to their relatives), and
work mischief in the land, on them is the curse (i.e. they will be far away
from Allaah’s Mercy), and for them is the unhappy (evil) home (i.e. Hell)”
[al-Ra’d 13:25]
Some relatives may cause the one who upholds ties with them
to fall into sin, especially if he is unable to change the evil that they
are doing. They may insist – for example – on listening to music and mixing
and indulging in swearing, mocking and backbiting. Such people have an
effect on their visitors and the one who seeks to uphold ties with them. The
Muslim has to advise his relatives as much as he is able to. They are more
entitled to this advice than others, but only if that will benefit them,
whether he is certain of that or thinks it most likely. But if he sees that
they are persisting in sin and especially major sins, and that is affecting
his faith and religious commitment, then it is sufficient for him to uphold
ties with them in the minimum fashion, so that he will not be severing the
ties of kinship. So instead of visiting them, he can just call them on the
phone, and if he visits them he does not have to stay for long, and so on.
But this should after trying his best to advise them and
exhort them and bring them back to the right way, as well as turning to
Allaah in du’aa’, asking Him to guide them to the straight path.
And Allaah knows best.
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