Tag: Q n A

Praise be to Allah.Is masturbation prohibited?
The masturbation is prohibited , as we have explained in the answer to question no. 329 . You have to repent from this action and give it up , and regret what you have done , and resolve not to go back to it. 
There are many punishments for the sinner in this world, let alone the punishment that he deserves in the Hereafter. We have already mentioned some of these punishments in the answer to question no. 23425 . 
So hasten to repent sincerely before you are no longer able to do so, and before you feel regret at the time when regret will be to no avail. 
If Allah honours you by enabling you to repent, you will be forgiven for this sin, and it will be as if it never happened. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “The one who repents is like the one who did not sin.” (Narrated by Ibn Majah; classed as good by Al-Albani in Sahih Ibn Majah, 3427) 
Punishment for Masturbation in Islam
Breaking the hymen as a result of masturbation is not Zina, and no Hadd (fixed prescribed punishment) or expiation is required. 
Shaykh Al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) was asked about masturbation and he replied: 
With regard to masturbation, the basic ruling is that it is prohibited according to the majority of scholars, and the one who does it should be given a Ta`zir punishment (punishments that are not fixed in Islam and are decided by the ruler), but it is not like Zina. And Allah knows best.” (Al-Fatawa Al-Kubra, 3/439) 
If it is obvious that the hymen has been broken as a result of masturbation, then you have to tell your fiancé what happened to you, without giving any details that may cause you embarrassment. It is sufficient for him to know that this happened without any fornication, because the hymen may be broken because of exercise, being beaten, falling or being sick. 
You will never be exposed if you repent to Allah and are sincere in your repentance, for Allah is the Concealer and loves concealment.
For more details, please refer to the following answers: 37673 , 127290 , 826 , and 2571 .
And Allah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.There are several causes of apathy and before dealing with the problem we have to pause and find out the cause. There are several ways of finding out the cause and dealing with apathy. 
Some of these causes are: a weak relationship with Allaah, laziness in worship, keeping company with careless people, being distracted by this world and its delights, and not thinking about the end of this world and the consequences of being ill-prepared to meet Allaah. 
As for how to treat the Muslim who has been afflicted by apathy in worship, there are several ways of doing so including the following: 
1 – Strengthening his relationship with his Lord, by reading the Qur’aan and pondering its meanings, realizing the greatness of Allaah by seeing the greatness of His Book, thinking about the greatness of His names and attributes and actions. 
2 – Regularly offering naafil prayers and persisting in doing so, even if they are few, because one of the greatest causes of the Muslim becoming apathetic is when he starts to do acts of worship and does a great deal in the beginning. This is not the way of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and is not what he advised his ummah to do. ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) described his actions as ongoing, i.e., not interrupted or infrequent. And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told us that, “The most beloved of actions to Allaah are those which are done persistently, even if they are little.” If a Muslim wants not to be afflicted by apathy, then let him strive to do a small action persistently, because this is better than doing a lot infrequently. 
3 – Striving to keep company with righteous and active people. A man who is energetic (in worship and Islamic activities) will make you more active and lazy people do not like active companions. So look for active friends who strive to memorize Qur’aan, seek knowledge and call people to Allaah. Friends like that will encourage you to worship and will show you the way to good things. 
4 – Read books that tell the stories of active people so that you will have good examples in your journey towards Allaah. For example, ‘Uluw al-Himmah by Shaykh Muhammad ibn Ismaa’eel al-Muqaddim; Salaah al-Ummah fi ‘Uluw al-Himmah by Shaykh Sayyid ‘Afaani. 
5 – We advise you to make du’aa’, especially in the latter part of the night. The one who turns to his Lord and seeks His help to remain steadfast in worshipping Him and to worship Him well will never be let down.
We ask Allaah to help you to do that which pleases Him and to guide you to the best attitudes, words and deeds. 
And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.We ask Allah to bless you with righteous offspring and to bless this child. 
There is nothing wrong with telling other people about the pregnancy after you find out about it, and it is not essential to wait until three months have passed. Rather it is permissible to tell others before then, but you should limit that to family and close friends only. This is a general principle which should be paid attention to when telling others of blessings. The news should be given only to those who wish good for you and will rejoice over it, so as to ward off the evil eye and destructive envy. 
The evidence for that is the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him): “Be discreet in order to achieve what you want, for everyone who is blessed is envied.” (Narrated by At-Tabarani and Abu Nu`aym; classed as authentic by Al-Albani in Sahih Al-Jami`, no. 943) 
For more details, please refer to the following answers: 82465 , 119767 , 12368 , 7889 , 12287 , and 88734 .            
And Allah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.The name of failure is enough to put us off it and strive for success, regardless of the material gains that a man may attain as the result of his success, because failure is a word that implies shortcomings and loss, and success is a word that implies perfection and praise. 
Failure and success are two sides of the same coin, although they may seem to contradict one another at first glance. But in fact they are interconnected if you think about it, based on experience and real life.
Success is the path in this life which Allaah wants to be the aim of every believer. He has created the universe and subjugated it to meet this aim. He, may He be glorified, has enjoined man to believe, and has asked him to adhere to full submission to Him, as he cannot be anything but a slave to Allaah, and He has made that the purpose of creation, as He says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“And I (Allaah) created not the jinn and mankind except that they should worship Me (Alone)”
[al-Dhaariyaat 51:56]
And He has promised that the one who dies following this path will be the successful one, and others will be losers: 
“And whoever is removed away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise, he indeed is successful”
[Aal ‘Imraan 3:185]
So success is the story of life, the purpose for which Allaah has created this universe. He only sent the Messengers and revealed the Books to call people to attain true success before Allaah. He has decreed certain matters in order to motivate us to attain success in this world and in the Hereafter, as follows: 
-He decreed eternal and everlasting delight for those who pass the test of faith and full submission, and adhere to that path and die following it:
“Then as for him who will be given his Record in his right hand will say: ‘Here! read my Record!
20. ‘Surely, I did believe that I shall meet my Account!’
21. So he shall be in a life, well‑pleasing.
22. In a lofty Paradise,
23. The fruits in bunches whereof will be low and near at hand.
24. Eat and drink at ease for that which you have sent on before you in days past!”
[al-Haaqqah 69:19-24]
-The Qur’aan depicts the state of those who refused to follow the path of success and insisted on following the path of evil and failure, and described their situation on the Day when results will be shown, and it will be known who succeeded and who failed:
“But as for him who will be given his Record in his left hand, will say: ‘I wish that I had not been given my Record!
26. ‘And that I had never known how my Account is!
27. ‘Would that it had been my end (death)!
28. ‘My wealth has not availed me;
29. ‘My power (and arguments to defend myself) have gone from me!’”
[al-Haaqqah 69:25-29]
-Allaah, may He be glorified and exalted, decreed a good life in this world for the one who follows the path of success, He said (interpretation of the meaning):
“Whoever works righteousness — whether male or female — while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter)”
[al-Nahl 16:97]
Ibn Katheer (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:  
This is a promise from Allaah to the one who does righteous deeds, that Allaah will give him a good life in this world, and a good life includes all kinds of comfort and delight. It was narrated from Ibn ‘Abbaas and others that they interpreted it as meaning a goodly halaal provision, and it was narrated from ‘Ali ibn Abi Taalib (may Allaah be pleased with him) that he interpreted it as meaning contentment. ‘Ali ibn Abi Talhah said, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbaas, that it means happiness. The correct view is that a good life includes all of these things. Tafseer al-Qur’aan il-‘Azeem (4/601). 
This is the way according to which the Muslim should live throughout his life. The one who starts out on the basis of this understanding will inevitably be led to success and achievement in all his affairs, both religious and worldly, because the believer knows that he is required to establish truth and justice in this world, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“Indeed We have sent Our Messengers with clear proofs, and revealed with them the Scripture and the Balance (justice) that mankind may keep up justice”
[al-Hadeed 57:25]
An individual’s success is part of the success of the ummah in achieving justice and fairness. 
And the believer also hears the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) who said: “Allaah loves, when one of you does a thing, that he should do it well.” Narrated by Abu Ya’la (7/349) and classed as hasan by al-Albaani on the basis of corroborating evidence in al-Silsilah al-Saheehah (1113). Doing things well is one of the pillars of success. 
These motives are all things that prepare the believer to attain the highest degrees of success. He always strives to develop his talents and learn useful skills, and to develop himself on the educational, moral, social and economic levels. He knows that the successful, striving believer is better than the one who is idle and lazy, who earns nothing from his laziness but loss in both worldly and religious terms. 
It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The strong believer is better and more beloved to Allaah than the weak believer, although both are good. Strive to do that which will benefit you and seek the help of Allaah, and do not feel helpless. If anything befalls you, do not say ‘If only I had done (such and such), the such and such would have happened,’ rather say: ‘Allaah has decreed and what He wills He does,’ for ‘if only’ opens the door to the work of the shaytaan.” Narrated by Muslim (2664). 
Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: This hadeeth includes several important principles of faith, including the following: 
That a person’s happiness lies in his seeking that which will benefit him in this life and in the Hereafter, and this striving means expending effort and doing one’s utmost. Because a man’s striving and action can only be with the help of Allaah and by His will and support, He commanded him to seek His help, so that he will be acting in accordance with the meaning of the verse (interpretation of the meaning): “You (Alone) we worship, and You (Alone) we ask for help (for each and everything)” [al-Faatihah 1:5]. His striving for that which will benefit him is an act of worship to Allaah, which cannot be done except with His help, so He commanded him to worship Him and seek His help. 
Then he said: “and do not feel helpless”, because feeling helpless is contrary to striving for that which will benefit him, and it is contrary to seeking the help of Allaah. The one who strives for that which will benefit him and seeks the help of Allaah is the opposite of the one who feels helpless, so this is telling him, before what has been decreed happens, of that which is one of the greatest means of attaining it, which is striving for it whilst seeking the help of the One in Whose hand is control of all things, from Whom they come and to Whom they will return. If he does not attain what was not decreed for him, then he may feel either of two things: helplessness, which opens the door to the work of the shaytaan, so his sense of helplessness leads him to say “if only”, but there is nothing good in saying “if only” in this case, rather that opens the door to blame, panic, discontentment, regret and grief, all of which are the work of the shaytaan, so the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade us to open the door to his works in this manner, and told us to adopt the second option, which is looking at the divine decree and bearing it in mind, for if it was decreed for him it would never have missed him and no one could have prevented him from attaining it. Hence he said: “If anything befalls you, do not say ‘If only I had done (such and such), the such and such would have happened,’ rather say: ‘Allaah has decreed and what He wills He does,’” and he taught him that which will benefit him in either case, whether he gets what he wanted or not. Hence this hadeeth is one which a person can never do without. 
Shifa’ al-‘Aleel (37-38). 
With this thinking one can overcome every obstacle and every failure, and there is nothing that he cannot achieve; there will be no limit to his hopes and no end to his ambition and resolve.  
Rather he will realize that failure is a sign of someone who is striving, because the one who strives is the one who may fail, but the one who does nothing and is lazy will neither fail nor succeed. Effort must inevitably lead to success one day, even if it is a long way off. So he should take failure as a step towards success, learning from it the causes of shortcomings, and trying to overcome them and set them straight, so that he becomes stronger than he was before, until he attains the success for which he is striving. 
The door of repentance which Allaah, may He be exalted, has opened to those who make mistakes and fail is another incentive to overcome failures and attain success, especially if the one who falls short learns from his experience. One of the salaf said: A sin that generates humility and regret is better than an act of obedience that generates self-admiration and arrogance. 
Finally, with all these motives for attaining success and overcoming failure, there remains no excuse for being inactive or lazy. The way is easy and all it requires of you is some determination, will power and wisdom. 
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “All of my ummah will enter Paradise except those who refuse.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (7280). 
See also the answer to question no. 22704. 
And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.It should be understood that the more a person tries to draw close to Allah, the more the Shaytan will try to block his path in order to undermine his efforts and make his life difficult, and divert him from worshipping and obeying Allah, may He be exalted.
So the Muslim must strive to be patient and strive against his nafs and evil inclinations and against the Shaytan. He should offer a lot of supplication and beseech Allah, may He be exalted, to help him to remain steadfast.
Upholding regular prayer, keeping away from haram things, remembering Allah a great deal, and seeking to draw close to Him by doing supererogatory (nafil) acts of worship – all of this is the straight path, which you must strive hard to adhere to and be patient in bearing its hardships.
Remember the words of the Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him): “A person will still be answered so long as his supplication does not involve sin or severing ties of kinship, and so long as he does not become impatient.” It was said: O Messenger of Allah, what does being impatient mean? He said: “Saying, I offered supplication, and I offered supplication, and I did not receive any response, then he becomes frustrated and stops offering supplication.” Narrated by Muslim (2735).
So do not say, “I remembered Allah a great deal, and I prayed and I spent the night in prayer, but my heart was not softened.” Rather you should strive hard in remembering Allah (dhikr), praying and spending the night in prayer (qiyam), until you attain what you are seeking.
As it is said: Whoever keeps knocking on the door, it will be opened to him; as for the one who knocks only once and goes away…
You should understand that what befalls you sometimes of grief, sadness, distress and lack of motivation is part of the Shaytan’s scheme that he uses against the believers to make them despondent. Once a person realizes that, and he becomes certain that it is the scheme of the Shaytan, then he will be on the alert and will seek refuge with Allah from that.
And you should understand that the sweetness of faith and finding pleasure in the remembrance of Allah, may He be exalted, is something that the believer will never attain except after striving against his nafs and evil inclinations, and against the Shaytan. Hence one of the early generations said: I struggled to make myself read the Quran for twenty years, then I found pleasure in it for twenty years. Similarly, finding pleasure in the remembrance of Allah and obeying Him can only come after persisting in doing righteous deeds and striving hard for a long time, until the believer starts to taste the sweetness of faith.
May Allah help you to do that which He loves and is pleased with, and may He suffice you against the evil of your own self (nafs) and the evil of the Shaytan.
And Allah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.Causes of wife’s problems with husband’s family
There are many problems that may arise between the wife and her husband’s family . In order to solve any problem, we should examine the causes before anything else:

The causes may be connected to the attitude of the husband’s family . There are some people for whom causing trouble is second nature, and they make mountains out of molehills and exaggerate about trivial, insignificant matters. But when people are like this, problems do not exist only between them and their son’s wife; rather they have troubles with everyone.

Solving this problem requires a great deal of effort to teach them right from wrong and good from evil, and to educate them about faith and obedience to Allah. In this case, the husband who is aware of his family’s nature and attitude should not pay any attention to what they say about his wife, and he should not attach any significance to it. Rather he should try to advise his family and call them to what is good, and he should comfort his wife if she suffers mistreatment at the hands of his family.

The cause of troubles may be the fault of both sides: jealousy that takes root in the hearts of the husband’s family , when they see how fond he is of his wife and how he shows compassion to her.

The solution to this problem is compensating them by showing extra compassion and special care towards them and giving them a lot of gifts, whilst not showing affection to his wife in front of them. Moreover, the husband should pay special attention towards them, and offer a great deal of supplication asking Allah to remove the jealousy from their hearts.

The cause of these problems may be what the husband’s family see in the wife of falling short with their son, or with her children, or in taking care of her house, or what she demonstrates of shameful behaviour by not showing respect to their mother, and other things that could be real – not made-up – in many wives. This is the silver lining to these problems, because through it the wife may come to realise her shortcomings and negligence, and thus be able to make up for her shortcomings and rectify the situation, for the wife cannot claim to be perfect in her behaviour and attitude.

This is the easiest cause of such problems to fix, because the solution is easy and possible; the wife can rectify herself and mend the relationship between her and her husband’s family by improving her behaviour and giving each person his or her due respect. Thus she will be able to rectify the situation, resolve the problem and gain her husband’s appreciation.
Wife’s obedience to husband
What we think is that the wife should obey her husband if he tells her not to tell anyone else of what happens between her and his family. This decision on the husband’s part serves an important interest that surpasses the interest of the wife venting and getting things off her chest. That is because if, in such cases, the problems become widely known, everyone will have an opinion or will use it to come up with some scheme, or will give bad advice for solving these problems, which will only make matters worse and create further problems, and will generate more causes of trouble, with the result that it may become very difficult to find a solution after that.
It is permissible for the wife to complain to a wise person, and that does not come under the heading of backbiting, which is prohibited. See the answer to question no. 7660 . At the same time, the husband has the right to prevent her from doing this permissible thing, if he thinks that there is a legitimate purpose to be served by that.
What we think is that you made a mistake by not complying with his advice, and speaking to your sister and your brother’s wife about what has been going on between you and your husband’s family. In order to rectify that, you must repent and seek forgiveness, and not carry on talking to them about this matter. You should urge them not to tell anyone else about anything that you told them. There is no need to confess to your husband what you did, because it will serve no purpose; rather it could result in more trouble. For example, he could start resenting you and what you did; or he could prevent you from speaking to your sister and your brother’s wife at all. 
All of that is possible, because the devil is always present and has a great impact at such times, for he will fan the flames, exacerbate the matter and will do his utmost to create enmity and resentment because of this trouble.
How can you get along with your husband’s family?
Dealing with your husband and his family requires great wisdom on your part. But you – in Sha Allah – are able to cope with that, as is quite evident to us from your saying “because we, my sisters and I, were raised not to answer back to the one who mistreats us. I even do not know how to respond politely, except very rarely, and afterwards I feel guilty” and from your other comment “and when I visit them I do not show that I am upset. Sometimes she says hurtful or embarrassing things, and I act normally, but I am very angry inside.” This is a thing that no one can do except one who has self-control, and no one can do that except wise people.
What is required of you now is the following:

Ignore what you hear from your husband’s  family which you can tell is aimed at upsetting and provoking you and is pure fabrication, with no substance.
Pay attention to yourself, your house, your children and whatever you hear from them that is true [in terms of shortcomings]; you have to rectify these things and do them properly.
Try to be friendly towards his family, showing good manners, speaking gently and behaving kindly. Make sure to give them appropriate gifts from time to time, or some food that you have made for them, or some sweets that you have made specially for them. For it is well known that gifts have a great impact in bringing people together and spreading love and affection between them.
Be kind to your husband by not telling anyone about how his family treats you, and make him trust you more; do not let him hear or see anything from you that he does not like.
However, that does not mean that you should keep completely quiet about fabricated accusations that may be made against you. We advise you to refer that to your husband, and let him take responsibility for putting things right and giving each person their due. Show him that your family raised you well.
Finally, there is nothing wrong with suggesting to your husband that you should move away and not live close to his family. However, he is not obliged to respond. Your right is only to have separate accommodation, and you already have that. But wisdom and your best interests dictate that the husband should move further away from his family, if he realises that there is no harmony between them and his wife. Perhaps moving away may contribute to strengthening the bonds between all parties, and may remove some of these ill feelings and resentment from everyone’s hearts.

Seek the help of Allah your Lord by offering supplication, and doing the duties that are required of you. We ask Allah, may He be exalted, to enable you to do that which pleases Him, and to reconcile between you all.
And Allah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.Does Islam respect and honour women?
The believer should be certain that Islam respects and honours women , and treats them fairly and gives them their rights. Islam honours the woman as a mother, as a daughter, as a sister and as a wife. This is well known in the religious texts and teachings.
Allah, may He be Glorified, is the Creator of male and female; He is their Lord, the One Whom they worship, and He is far above any injustice:
{And your Lord is not ever unjust to [His] servants.} [Fussilat 41:46]
{And your Lord does injustice to no one.} [Al-Kahf 18:49]
The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) was compassionate and merciful towards his Ummah; he did not differentiate between men and women in that regard. Rather he specifically instructed men to treat women kindly, lest they be oppressed or mistreated. He (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) was the greatest in showing kindness to and honouring his wives, to the extent that he said that the best of people is the one who is best to his wife, and he said: “The most perfect of the believers in faith is the best of them in attitude, and the best of you are those who are best in attitude to their wives.” (Narrated by At-Tirmidhi, 1082; classed as authentic by Al-Albani in Sahih At-Tirmidhi)
He (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) also said: “The best of you is the one who is best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives.” (Narrated by At-Tirmidhi, 3895 and Ibn Majah, 1977; classed as authentic by Al-Albani in Sahih At-Tirmidhi)
And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “I urge you to be kind to women.” (Narrated by Al-Bukhari, 3331 and Muslim, 1468)
Whoever takes these facts into account will be able to understand the texts referred to in the question in an appropriate manner. There is nothing in our religion that undermines the status of women or scorns them. How could that be the case when a woman is the mother who is more deserving of honour and kindness than the father; and she is the wife whom Allah has described as a source of comfort and joy and, in fact, the best of worldly joys; and she is the mother of children and progeny – so how could a man accept for the mother of his children to be blameworthy and despised?
Are women deficient in Intellect?
With regard to a woman’s lack of reason , it is explained in the Hadith. It is because women are easily swayed by emotions, which make them unable to deal appropriately with new issues that arise. Hence there is a need, with regard to giving testimony, for someone who will complete her testimony and remind her if she forgets.
Are women deficient in religion?
As for their lack of religious commitment, it is also explained. It is because women do not pray and fast during the days of their menses and when they are bleeding following childbirth. They are not to be blamed for that shortcoming, and it is not possible for them to avoid it; rather it is only a shortcoming in comparison to the one who is not prevented from praying and fasting. This is the bounty of Allah which He bestows upon whomever He wills.
Allah has told the believers that no one among them should wish for what someone else has been favoured with over him, as He says (interpretation of the meaning):
{And do not wish for that by which Allah has made some of you exceed others. For men is a share of what they have earned, and for women is a share of what they have earned. And ask Allah of his bounty. Indeed Allah is ever, of all things, Knowing.} [An-Nisa’ 4:32]
It was narrated from Mujahid (may Allah have mercy on him), from Umm Salamah (may Allah be pleased with her), that she said: Men go on campaign [Jihad] and women do not go on campaign, and we only receive half of the share of inheritance. Then Allah revealed the words: {And do not wish for that by which Allah has made some of you exceed others.} [An-Nisa’ 4:32] Mujahid said: And the verse {Indeed, the Muslim men and Muslim women, the believing men and believing women, the obedient men and obedient women, the truthful men and truthful women, the patient men and patient women, the humble men and humble women, the charitable men and charitable women, the fasting men and fasting women, the men who guard their private parts and the women who do so, and the men who remember Allah often and the women who do so – for them Allah has prepared forgiveness and a great reward} [Al-Ahzab 33:35] was revealed concerning her. (Narrated by At-Tirmidhi, 3022; classed as authentic by Al-Albani)
We have previously explained what is meant by women lacking in reason and religious commitment in the answer to question no. 111867  . There we stated that they are lacking only in what is mentioned in the Hadith, and this does not apply to everything.
We do not think that the fact that a woman is easily swayed by her emotions and, as a result, cannot handle some issues rationally is to be regarded as a criticism, for Allah has prepared women to deal with some serious issues that men are unable to handle, which includes taking care of her children and putting up with hardship that no one else but women can bear. The woman also shows patience in putting up with her husband and his annoyance, but she quickly forgives him and reconciles with him.
Meaning of creating women from rib 
The fact that woman was created from a rib, and the most crooked part of the rib is the top, is something that was decreed by the divine decree, and woman is not responsible for that and she cannot object to her Creator so long as she is a believer, for He is Most Wise, Most Aware of what He creates and decrees.
The fact that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) spoke about that is for the purpose of urging men to show kindness to women and to be patient in putting up with any annoyance that may come from them; they should not criticise women, rebuke them or belittle them.
Al-Bukhari (1468) and Muslim (1468) narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women kindly , for woman was created from a rib. The most crooked part of the rib is the top of it. If you try to straighten it you will break it, but if you leave it alone, it will remain crooked. So I urge you to treat women kindly.”
Muslim (1468) narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “A woman was created from a rib and she will never be consistent with you in any way. If you want to, you can enjoy your life with her, even though there is some crookedness in her, but if you try to straighten her you will break her – and breaking her means divorcing her.”
Ahmad (20093) and Al-Hakim (7333) narrated from Samurah ibn Jundub (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Woman was created from a rib, and if you want to straighten the rib, you will break it. So be kind to her and you will be able to live with her.” (Classed as authentic by the commentators on Al-Musnad, and by Al-Albani in Sahih Al-Jami`, 1944)
Women were created with some natural weakness and their own inclinations; they are very jealous and easily swayed by emotions. Whoever overlooks that and forgives his wife’s mistakes will have an easy life with her, but whoever picks on every minor issue and wants to correct her in every single matter will have a lot of trouble with her and will not enjoy his life with her, and that will lead to his divorcing her.
This is something that husbands and anyone who has dealt with marital issues is aware of.
If a woman does not accept these facts, it is because she has never studied the issues of women with their husbands.
A man may treat his wife kindly for a lifetime, then if he does one thing to upset her, she says: I have never seen any good in you!
Showing ingratitude in this manner is something that may also occur among men, but it is more common among women, and it is part of the inclination that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) described as crookedness and instructed men to be patient in putting up with it.
It has been explained above that the idea of showing kindness to avoid trouble is referred to in a Hadith; it is not something that the scholars came up with. What it means is overlooking shortcomings, as noted above. It does not mean thinking that the woman is insane or has a mental illness, as you suggested.
As for crookedness in attitude and similar expressions, this description does not apply to every woman, or suggest that the attitude of all women is like that. Rather what is referred to is the mistakes that they make, and what results from them being swayed by their emotions and reacting too quickly, and the like.
The words of any person may be accepted or rejected, except the words of the infallible Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him).
Think about what you said: “And many more questions spring to mind when I read the Quran and tafsir.” This is an example of exaggeration and jumping to conclusions, which is something that reflects the attitude of women. What have you found in the Quran that is akin to what you have mentioned in your question?
Furthermore, we find such questions, in which there is objection to the words of Allah or the words of His Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) very off-putting. We wonder about one in whose heart faith has become established; why is he worrying about such things?
It is sufficient for the believing man or believing woman to strive to do righteous deeds, in order to attain bliss and happiness in this world and the hereafter, as Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):
{Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer – We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do.} [An-Nahl 16:97]
{And whoever does righteous deeds, whether male or female, while being a believer – those will enter Paradise and will not be wronged, [even as much as] the speck on a date seed.} [An-Nisa’ 4:124]
{And their Lord responded to them, “”Never will I allow to be lost the work of [any] worker among you, whether male or female; you are of one another.”} [Al `Imran 3:195]
So focus on your worship and doing righteous deeds, and ignore these intrusive thoughts and specious arguments, for this world is the realm of striving, and tomorrow each soul will be paid in full what it has earned, and those who sowed will reap what they sowed.
We ask Allah to fill your heart with reassurance and comfort, to make your affairs easy for you, and to protect you against the tricks of the Shaytan.
And Allah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.Difference between the means and causes and the One Who created them 
The best remedy for you is to differentiate between the means and causes and the One Who created them, for it is Allah, may He be Exalted, Who decrees the means and causes and brings them into existence. As for humans, employment and work, these are nothing but means or causes.
It is Allah, may He be Exalted, Who is the Provider, and He, may He be Glorified, has decreed that there should be causes and means for provision. The one who has some problems in his `Aqidah regards the means or causes as being the same as the One Who creates and brings about these causes.
According to Islam, the Muslims should not rely on these means and causes and ignore the One Who created them, and at the same time there is no room for ignoring these means and causes and giving them up.
Shaykh Al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: 
“What the Muslim should know is what was stated by a group of scholars. They said:  Paying attention to means and causes is a kind of Shirk that undermines belief in the oneness of Allah (Tawhid); ignoring the means and causes and not taking them into consideration is a sign of a lack of rational thinking; and turning away from the means and causes altogether is contrary to Islamic teachings; rather putting one’s trust and hope in Allah is something that is in complete harmony with Tawhid, rational thinking and Islamic teachings.
To explain further: paying attention to means and causes means relying on them in your heart and putting your hope in them, but there is nothing in creation that deserves that, because nothing in creation is independent; there must inevitably be other factors that either enhance them or oppose them. Moreover, if the Creator of the cause does not make the cause lead to results, it will not work. This is one of the things that prove that Allah is the Lord and Sovereign of all things, and that the heavens and the earth, everything in between them, the stars and planets, and what they contain all have a Creator and Controller Who is distinct from them.” ( Majmu` Al-Fatawa, 8/169)
And he (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
“The individual should rely in his heart on Allah, not on any means or causes, for Allah will make available to him means and causes that will rectify his condition in this world and the hereafter. If these means and causes are measures that he can take – and he is enjoined to take them – then he should do that, whilst putting his trust in Allah, just as he does obligatory duties, and just as he strives against the enemy, takes up arms and wears a helmet in battle, and he does not think that it is sufficient, when warding off the enemy, to merely put one’s trust in Allah without doing what is enjoined of striving in Jihad. The one who neglects the means and measures that he is enjoined to take is a failure, negligent and blameworthy.” (Majmu` Al-Fatawa, 8/528, 529)
How to overcome fear of losing means of provision 
In your case, for example, your parents are the means of your maintenance, but you should realise that Allah, may He be Exalted, has caused them to be like that. You must believe that Allah, may He be Exalted, is able to decree more than one means of your provision and maintenance. 
Look around you: do you think that all the students are being supported by their families who spend on their maintenance? The answer is: Definitely not, and if you reflect on the means of their provision and maintenance, you will see that they are many and various. 
So this matter is not limited to your parents, such that you should fear that the means of your maintenance may be cut off, and it is not right for you to put them on the same level as Allah, the Provider, may He be Exalted. There is a vast difference between the Creator and the created being, between the One Who decrees and brings about the means and causes, and the means and causes themselves.
Reflect upon the words of Allah, may He be Exalted (interpretation of the meaning): {Or who is it that could provide for you if He withheld His provision? But they have persisted in insolence and aversion.} [Al-Mulk 67:21] You will find that this matter is very clear.
In this verse, Allah, may He be Exalted, informs the disbelievers that He, may He be Exalted, decrees provision by means of its causes, such as rain, rivers, and springs, and that if He, may He be Exalted, willed, He could withhold these means, so He could prevent the rain from falling and the rivers from flowing, and could cause the springs to dry up. Who is it that could prevent that, and who is it that could bring these means of provision?
Another remedy for your issue is to reflect upon the verse in which Allah, may He be Exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):
{And whoever fears Allah – He will make for him a way out,
And will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies upon Allah – then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will accomplish His purpose. Allah has already set for everything a [decreed] extent.} [At-Talaq 65:2-3]
You think that if your parents die, your maintenance will be cut off, but Allah, may He be Exalted, is telling you that if a person fears Him, does what is required and refrains from what is forbidden, He will grant him provision from where he does not expect!
In other words, He will make available to him means of provision that he did not expect and that never crossed his mind. If a person truly put his trust in Allah, Allah, may He be Exalted, would suffice him and take care of all his worries. This is the exact remedy for your case, for your conflation between the means of provision and the One Who created those means, and for your anxiety and worry.
Read the words of this great scholar to find the remedy to heal your anxiety, distress and sorrow:
Shaykh `Abd Ar-Rahman As-Sa`di (may Allah have mercy on him) said in his commentary on the verse, {But if they separate [by divorce], Allah will enrich each [of them] from His abundance. And ever is Allah Encompassing and Wise} [An-Nisa 4:130 – interpretation of the meaning]:
“This verse indicates that the individual should put his hope in Allah alone, and that if Allah decrees for him some means of earning a living and being comfortable, he should praise Him for that and ask Him to bless it for him. If that means of provision becomes no longer available, or it becomes difficult for him to attain it, he should not feel anxious, for this is just one of many, unlimited means, and a person’s provision is not dependent upon that particular means. Allah may make available another means that is better and more beneficial than it, or He may make available to him a number of means. Whatever the case, he should always keep in mind the blessings of his Lord and hope for His generosity, and he should focus on that, and offer a great deal of supplication accompanied by hope. For Allah says in the Hadith Qudsi: “I am as My slave thinks I am. If he thinks well of Me, then that is what he will get, and if he thinks ill of Me, then that is what he will get.” (Narrated by Ahmad; classed as authentic by Al-Albani in Sahih At-Targhib, 3386). And He says: “So long as you call upon Me and put your hope in Me, I shall forgive you regardless of your sin, and I will not mind.” (Narrated by At-Tirmidhi, 2805; classed as authentic by Al-Albani in Sahih At-Tirmidhi).” (Taysir Al-Latif Al-Mannan fi Khulasat Tafsir Al-Ahkam,  p. 85, Al-Ma`arif edn.)
Then reflect upon the Hadith of `Umar ibn Al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him), according to which he heard the Prophet of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) say: “If you truly put your trust in Allah as you should, He would provide for you as He provides for the birds: they go out in the morning hungry and they return in the evening with full bellies.” (Narrated by Ahmad, 205 and At-Tirmidhi, 2344; classed as authentic by Al-Albani)
You should understand that your remedy is to develop trust in Allah, and truly put your hope in Him and be connected to Him. It has nothing to do with the death or life of anyone , because Allah’s way in dealing with His creation is not to change anything for the death or life of anyone.
Get rid of sins and repent to Allah
One last thing: it may be that what you are feeling of anxiety, worry and distress is because of some sins that you have been committing. So examine yourself and deal with whatever you may have fallen into of sins, for Allah, may He be Exalted, may hasten the punishment for the one who is like this. We know about the wrongdoing and sins that occur in mixed universities, so strive to rid yourself of them and repent from them .
Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
“One of the punishments for sin is that Allah, may He be Glorified, casts terror and fear into the heart of the sinner, so you always see him nervous and scared. Obedience to Allah is the great fortress , and whoever enters it will be one of those who are safe from the punishments of this world and the hereafter, whereas the one who exits it will be surrounded with fears on all sides. So for the one who obeys Allah, his fears will dissipate and turn into feelings of security, but for the one who disobeys Him, his feelings of security will turn into fear. You will never find any sinner but it is as if his heart is filled with anxiety: if the wind moves the door, he thinks that people are coming to get him; if he hears footsteps, he fears that he will soon be finished; he thinks that everyone is against him and that every bad thing will happen to him. The one who fears Allah will be safe from everything, but the one who does not fear Allah, Allah will cause him to be afraid of everything.” (Al-Jawab Al-Kafi,  p. 50).
For more details, please see the following answers: 20088  and 22704 .

Praise be to Allah.This woman and her guardians should be keen to choose a righteous husband who is pleasing in terms of his religious commitment and character, after asking and researching and trying to find out, and they should not be deceived by outward appearances or only focus on his financial standing.
We ask Allah, may he be exalted, to make this sister patient and grant her reward, and to compensate her with something better.
We advise her to be patient, in the hope that Allah, may He be exalted, will heal her husband and rectify his condition. That will be better for her and her foetus than divorce.
As for aborting the foetus before forty days have passed, there is a well-known difference of opinion among the fuqaha’. This has been discussed in a number of previous questions. Please see the answer to question no. 13319 and 42321 .
And Allah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.Peace of mind, contentment, happiness and freedom from worries and anxiety… these are what everyone wants, and these are the ways in which people can have a good life and find complete happiness and joy. There are religious means of achieving this, and natural and practical means, but no one can combine all of them except the believers; although other people may achieve some of them, they will miss out on others. 
Here follows a summary of the means of achieving this aim for which everyone is striving. In some cases, those who achieve many of them will live a joyful life and a good life; in other cases, those who fail to achieve all of them will live a life of misery and hardship. And there are others which are in between, according to the means they are able to attain. These means include the following: 
1 – Faith and righteous deeds:
This is the greatest and most fundamental of means. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“Whoever works righteousness — whether male or female — while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter).” [al-Nahl 16:97]
Allah tells us and promises us that whoever combines faith with righteous deeds will have a good life and a good reward in this world and in the Hereafter. 
The reason for this is clear: those who believe in Allah – with sincere faith that motivates them to do righteous deeds that change hearts and attitudes and guides them to the straight path in this world and the Hereafter – follow principles and guidelines by means of which they deal with everything that happens to them, be it the causes of happiness and excitement or the causes of anxiety, worry and grief. 
They deal with the things that they like by accepting them and giving thanks for them, and using them in good ways. When they deal with them in this manner, it creates in them a sense of excitement and the hope that it will continue and that they will be rewarded for their gratitude, which is more important than the good things that happen to them. And they deal with bad things, worries and distress by resisting those that they can resist, alleviating those that they can alleviate, and bearing with goodly patience those that they cannot avoid. Thus as a result of the bad things they gain a lot of benefits, experience, strength, patience and hope of reward, which are more important and which diminish the hardships they have undergone and replace them with happiness and hope for the bounty and reward of Allah. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) expressed this in a saheeh hadeeth (authentic report) in which he said: “How wonderful is the situation of the believer, for all his affairs are good. If something good happens to him, he gives thanks for it and that is good for him; if something bad happens to him, he bears it with patience, and that is good for him. This does not apply to anyone but the believer.” (Narrated by Muslim, no. 2999). 
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) told us that the believer is always gaining and the reward for his deeds is always multiplying, no matter what happens to him, good or bad. 
2 – Being kind to people in word and deed, and all kinds of doing good. This is one of the means of removing worry, distress and anxiety. By this means Allah wards off worries and distress from the righteous and immoral alike, but the believer has the greater share of this, and is distinguished by the fact that his kindness to others stems from sincerity and the hope of reward, so Allah makes it easy for him to be kind to others because of the hope that this will bring good things and ward off bad things, by means of his sincerity and hope of reward. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“There is no good in most of their secret talks save (in) him who orders Sadaqah (charity in Allah’s Cause), or Ma‘roof (Islamic Monotheism and all the good and righteous deeds which Allah has ordained), or conciliation between mankind; and he who does this, seeking the good Pleasure of Allah, We shall give him a great reward.”[al-Nisa 4:114]
Part of this great reward is relief from worry, distress, troubles, etc. 
3 – Another of the means of warding off anxiety that stems from nervous tension and being preoccupied with disturbing thoughts is to occupy oneself with good deeds or seeking beneficial knowledge. This will distract one from dwelling on the matters that are causing anxiety. In this way a person may forget about the things that are making him worried and distressed, and he may become happy and more energetic. This is another means that believers and others have in common, but the believer is distinguished by his faith, sincerity and hope of reward when he occupies himself with the knowledge that he is learning or teaching, or with the good deeds that he is doing. 
The work with which he occupies himself should be something that he likes and enjoys, for that is more likely to produce the desired results. And Allah knows best. 
4 – Another thing that may ward off worry and anxiety is focusing all one’s thoughts on the present day, and not worrying about the future or grieving about the past. Hence the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) sought refuge with Allah from worry and regret, from regret for things in the past which cannot be put right or changed, and worry which may come because of fear for the future. So one should focus only on the present day, and focus one’s efforts on getting things right today. If a person is focused on the present, he will do things properly and forget about worry and regret.
When the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said a du’a (supplication) or taught a du’a to his ummah (followers), as well as urging them to seek the help of Allah and hope for His bounty, he was also urging them to strive to attain the thing they were praying for through their own efforts and to forget about the thing which they were praying would be warded off from them because du’a (supplication) must be accompanied by action. So a person must strive to attain that which will benefit him in worldly and spiritual terms, and ask his Lord to make his efforts successful, and he should seek His help in this, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Strive for that which will benefit you and seek the help of Allah, and do not be helpless. If anything (bad) happens to you, do not say, ‘If only I had done such-and-such, then such-and-such would have happened.’ Rather you should say, ‘Qaddara Allah wa ma sha a fa’ala (Allah decrees, and what He wills He does),’ for (the words) ‘If only’ open the door to the Shaytan.” (Narrated by Muslim). The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) connected the matter of striving to achieve good things with the matter of seeking the help of Allah and not giving in to feelings of helplessness which are a harmful kind of laziness, and with the matter of accepting things in the past which are over and done with, and acknowledging that the will and decree of Allah will inevitably come to pass. He described matters as being of two types: 
1 – Matters which a person may strive to achieve or to achieve whatever he can of them, or to ward them off or alleviate them. In such cases a person must strive and make the effort, and also seek the help of Allah. 
2 – Matters where such is not possible, so he must have peace of mind, accept them and submit to Allah’s will. 
Undoubtedly paying attention to this principle will bring happiness and relieve worry and distress. 
5 – One of the greatest means of feeling content and relaxed and of acquiring peace of mind is to remember Allah a great deal (dhikr). That has a great effect in bringing contentment and peace of mind, and relieving worry and distress. Allah says: 
“Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” [al-Ra’d 13:28]
Remembering Allah (dhikr) has a great effect in achieving this aim because it has a special influence and because of the hope that it brings of reward. 
6 – Another of the means of bringing happiness and relieving worry and distress is striving to eliminate the things that cause worry and to achieve the things that bring happiness. That may be done by forgetting about bad things in the past which cannot be changed, and realizing that dwelling on them is a waste of time. So a person must strive to stop himself from thinking of them, and also strive to stop himself from feeling anxious about the future and the things that he may imagine of poverty, fear and other bad things that he thinks may happen to him in the future. He should realize that the future is something that is unknown, he cannot know what good or bad things are going to happen to him. That is in the hand of the Almighty, the Most Wise, and all that His slaves can do is to strive to attain the good things and to ward off the bad things. A person should realize that if he diverts his thoughts from worrying about his future and puts his trust in his Lord to take care of his situation, and puts his mind at rest concerning this, if he does this, then his heart will be at peace and his situation will improve and he will be relieved of worry and anxiety. 
One of the most effective ways of dealing with worries about the future is to recite this du’a which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to recite: 
“Allahumma aslih li deeni alladhi huwa ‘ismatu amri, wa aslih li dunyaya allati fiha ma’ashi, wa aslih li akhirati allati ilayha ma’adi, waj’al al-hayata ziyadatan li fi kulli khayr, wa’l-mawta rahatan li min kulli sharr (O Allah, correct my religious commitment which is the foundation of my life, and correct my worldly affairs in which is my livelihood, and grant me good in the Hereafter to which is my return. Make my life a means of accumulating good, and make death a respite for me from all evil).” (Narrated by Muslim, 2720). 
And he said, “Allahumma rahmataka arju fa la takilni ila nafsi tarfata ‘aynin wa aslih li shani kullahu, la ilaha illa anta (O Allah, for Your mercy I hope, so do not abandon me to myself even for a moment. And correct all my affairs. There is no god but You).” (Narrated by Abu Dawood with a saheeh isnad [chain of transmitters], no. 5090; classed as hasan/good by al-Albani in Saheeh al-Kalim al-Tayyib, p.49).  
If a person utters these du’as, which ask that his spiritual and worldly affairs may be set right or corrected, with proper presence of mind and sincerity of intention, whilst striving to achieve this, Allah will grant him what he has prayed for, hoped for and striven for, and He will turn his worry into joy and happiness. 
7 – If a person experiences anxiety and distress because of a disaster, then one of the most effective means of relieving himself of that is to think of the worst scenario to which that may lead, and try to accept that. When he has done this, then he should try to alleviate it as much as possible. By means of this acceptance and these efforts, he will relieve himself of his worries and distress, and instead of worrying he will strive to bring about good things and to deal with whatever he can of the bad things. If he is faced with things that cause fear or the possibility of sickness or poverty, then he should deal with this by striving to make himself accept it, or something even worse, with contentment, because by making himself accept the worst-case scenario, he lessens the impact of the thing and makes it seem less terrible, especially if he occupies himself with efforts to ward it off as much as he can. Thus as well as striving to achieve something good which will distract him from his worries about calamity, he will also renew his strength to resist bad things, and put his trust and reliance in Allah. Undoubtedly these matters are of great benefit in attaining happiness and peace of mind, as well as bringing the hope of reward in this world and in the Hereafter. This is something which is well known from the experience of many who have tried it. 
8 – Steadfastness of heart and not being disturbed about the imaginary things that bad thoughts may bring to mind. For when a person gives in to his imagination and lets his mind be disturbed by these thoughts, such as fear of disease and the like, or anger and confusion stirred up by some grievous matter, or the expectation of bad things and the loss of good things, it will fill him with worries, distress, mental and physical illness and nervous breakdowns, which will have a bad effect on him and which causes a great deal of harm, as many people have seen. But when a person depends on Allah and puts his trust in Him, and does not give in to his imagination or let bad thoughts overwhelm him, and he relies on Allah and has hope of His bounty, this wards off his worries and distress, and relieves him of a great deal of mental and physical sickness. It gives indescribable strength, comfort and happiness to the heart. How many hospitals are filled with the mentally sick victims of illusions and harmful imagination; how often have these things had an effect upon the hearts of many strong people, let alone the weak ones; how often have they led to foolishness and insanity. 
It should be noted that your life will follow your train of thought. If your thoughts are of things that will bring you benefit in your spiritual or worldly affairs, then your life will be good and happy. Otherwise it will be the opposite. 
The person who is safe from all of this is the one who is protected by Allah and helped by Him to strive to achieve that which will benefit and strengthen the heart and ward off anxiety. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“And whosoever puts his trust in Allah, then He will suffice him.” [al-Talaq 65:3]
i.e., He will be sufficient for all that is worrying him in his spiritual and worldly affairs. The one who puts his trust in Allah will have strength in his heart and will not be affected by anything he imagines or be disturbed by events, because he knows that these are the result of vulnerable human nature and of weakness and fear that have no basis. He also knows that Allah has guaranteed complete sufficiency to those who put their trust in Him. So he trusts in Allah and finds peace of mind in His promise, and thus his worry and anxiety are dispelled; hardship is turned to ease, sadness is turned to joy, fear is turned to peace. We ask Allah to keep us safe and sound, and to bless us with strength and steadfastness of heart, and complete trust, for Allah has guaranteed all good things to those who put their trust in Him, and has guaranteed to ward off all bad and harmful things from them. 
If bad things happen or there is the fear of such, then you should count the many blessings that you are still enjoying, both spiritual and worldly, and compare them with the bad things that have happened, for when you compare them you will see the many blessings that you are enjoying, and this will make the bad things appear less serious. 
See al-Wasail al-Mufeedah li’l-Hayat al-Sa’eedah by Shaykh ‘Abd al-Rahman ibn Sa’di 
Ibn al-Qayyim summed fifteen ways through which Allah may dispel worries and regret. These are as follows: 
1-     Tawheed al-Ruboobiyyah (belief in the Oneness of Divine Lordship)
2-     Tawheed al-Uloohiyyah (belief in the Oneness of the Divine nature)
3-     Tawheed of knowledge and belief (i.e., Tawheed al-Asma’ wa’l_Sifaat, belief in the Oneness of the Divine names and attributes)
4-     Thinking of Allah as being above doing any injustice to His slaves, and above punishing anyone for no cause on the part of the slave that would require such punishment.
5-     The person’s acknowledging that he is the one who has done wrong.
6-     Beseeching Allah by means of the things that are most beloved to Him, which are His names and attributes. Two of His names that encompass the meanings of all other names and attributes are al-Hayy (the Ever-Living) and al-Qayyoom (the Eternal).
7-     Seeking the help of Allah Alone.
8-     Affirming one’s hope in Him.
9-     Truly putting one’s trust in Him and leaving matters to Him, acknowledging that one’s forelock is in His hand and that He does as He wills, that His will is forever executed and that He is just in all that He decrees.
10- Letting one’s heart wander in the garden of the Quran, seeking consolation in it from every calamity, seeking healing in it from all diseases of the heart, so that it will bring comfort to his grief and healing for his worries and distress.
11- Seeking forgiveness.
12- Repentance.
13- Jihad.
14-Salah (prayer).
15-Declaring that he has no power and no strength, and leaving matters to the One in Whose hand they are.
We ask Allah to keep us safe and sound from worries and to relieve us of distress and anxiety, for He is the All-Hearing, Ever-Responsive, and He is the Ever-Living, Eternal.
See Alhomoom – Dealing with Worries and Stress, in the Books section of this site.
And Allah knows best.
May Allah send blessings and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad and his family and Companions.