Tag: Q n A

Praise be to Allah.
Working in mixed environments is not free of the risk of some
haraam things happening, such as looking, being alone with a person of the
opposite sex, or feeling attracted. Hence the scholars have issued fatwas
stating that it is haraam, based on what usually happens. It says in
Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah (12/156): 
Mixing of men and women
in schools and elsewhere is a great evil and has serious implications for
people’s religious and worldly interests. It is not permissible for a woman
to study or work in a place where men and women mix, and it is not
permissible for her guardian to allow her to do that. 

Based on that, the father has no right to force his daughter
to work in a mixed workplace. If he forces her to do that then she does not
have to obey him, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) said: “There is no obedience in sinful matters, rather obedience
is only (required) in that which is good and proper.” Narrated by
al-Bukhaari, 7257; Muslim, 1840. 

This daughter must explain to her father the dangers of
working in a mixed environment, and that it is haraam. She should remind him
of his duty to protect his family and save them from the Fire, and she
should do so in a wise manner and with beautiful preaching.  

And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
Firstly: 

The Muslim is obliged to adhere to the conditions that he set
and to fulfil his promises. Among the conditions that are most deserving of
fulfillment are those by means of which it becomes permissible for a man to
enjoy intimacy with his wife, namely the conditions of marriage. 
Al-Bukhaari (2821) and
Muslim (1418) narrated that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The conditions that most deserve to
be fulfilled are those by means of which it becomes permissible for you to
enjoy intimacy.” 

Ibn Qudaamah said in al-Mughni (7/448): 

The conditions of marriage fall into three categories: 

1 – Those which must be fulfilled, which are those which
benefit the wife, such as the condition that he will not make her leave her
house or city, or make her travel with him (i.e., take her to another
country). 

These must be fulfilled. If the husband does not do that then
the wife has the right to annul the marriage, because the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The conditions that most
deserve to be fulfilled are those by means of which it becomes permissible
for you to enjoy intimacy.” End quote. 

It is essential to differentiate between that which the
husband stated as a condition in the marriage, and a promise that he made
after the marriage contract was done. If it was a condition of marriage
(i.e., the marriage contract was done on the basis of this condition), then
the wife has the choice of waiving that condition or of annulling the
marriage, if her husband does not fulfil this condition. In this case she
should be given her rights in full. 

If it was a promise that he made after marriage, then he has
to fulfil his promise if he does not have an excuse. But the wife does not
have the right to annul the marriage if he does not fulfil it. This is the
ruling on this situation. 

We advise the husband to fulfil the condition and to keep his
promise, or to ask for his wife’s consent to waive the condition or to delay
fulfillment of the promise until a later, stated time. He has to fear Allaah
with regard to his wife and not bring haraam things and haraam entertainment
into the house. 

The sister who asked this question should be more patient and
put up with it. She should also try to get wise people from her family and
from his to intervene, in order to resolve the differences between them. 

Secondly:  

The husband has made a serious mistake by bringing the
satellite dish into the home and enabling his wife to see all the sinful
content that the dish brings. The one whom Allaah has put in charge of
others should be sincere towards them and not be negligent or heedless in
his duties towards them. 

Thirdly: 

The sister made a mistake, because she is not forced to look
at the evil scenes brought by the dish, and her being alone is no excuse.
She can occupy herself by worshipping Allaah, keeping company with righteous
women, doing permissible things, and reading and listening to things that
will benefit her in both her religious and worldly affairs.

Praise be to Allah.
Firstly: 

With regard to one who does not pray, we have explained the
ruling on that, and stated that some of the scholars – who expressed the
correct view – have ruled that such a person is a kaafir and it is not
permissible to marry such a person or to remain married to him, and that
meat slaughtered by him is haraam, and so on. We have discussed these
rulings in detail. Please see questions no.
34795 and
20059. 

Secondly: 

With regard to your brother’s wife making fun of those who
are religiously-committed and insulting them and mocking them, she should
understand that by doing these things she is in serious danger, and that
these actions may put her beyond the pale of Islam. 

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) was
asked about the ruling on making fun of those who adhere to the commandments
of Allaah and His Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him)? 

He replied: Making fun of those who adhere to the
commandments of Allaah and His Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) because of their commitment is haraam and is very dangerous and
serious, because there is the fear that his hatred for them may be based on
hatred of what they are adhering to, namely the religion of Allaah. In that
case mocking them is mocking the path that they are following. They are like
those of whom Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“If you ask them (about
this), they declare: ‘We were only talking idly and joking.’ Say: ‘Was it at
Allaah, and His Ayaat (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs,
revelations, etc.) and His Messenger that you were mocking?”

Make no excuse; you disbelieved after you had believed’”

[al-Tawbah 9:65-66]

These words were revealed concerning some of the hypocrites
who said: “We have never seen anything like these reciters – meaning the
Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and his
companions – they are the most greedy, the most false of speech and the most
cowardly in battle.” Then Allaah revealed this verse concerning them.  

Those who make fun of the followers of truth because they are
religiously-committed should beware, for Allaah says (interpretation of the
meaning): 

“Verily, (during the worldly life) those who committed
crimes used to laugh at those who believed.

30. And, whenever they passed by them, used to wink one to
another (in mockery).

31. And when they returned to their own people, they would
return jesting;

32. And when they saw them, they said: ‘Verily, these have
indeed gone astray!’

33. But they (disbelievers, sinners) had not been sent as
watchers over them (the believers).

34. But this Day (the Day of Resurrection) those who
believe will laugh at the disbelievers

35. On (high) thrones, looking (at all things).

36. Are not the disbelievers paid (fully) for what they
used to do?”

[al-Mutaffifeen 83:29-36]

Majmoo’ Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen,
2/question no. 236. 
Insulting a Muslim is a
major sin, especially if one insults him for being religiously committed and
righteous. There is the fear that the one who does this may fall into
apostasy as stated above with regard to mocking them. 

It was narrated from ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be
pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) said: “Insulting a Muslim is immorality and killing him is kufr.” 

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 48; Muslim, 64. 

Al-Nawawi said: 

In Arabic the word sabb (translated here as insulting)
means slandering a person and speaking of his honour in a disparaging
fashion. And fisq (translated here as immorality) means going out; in
sharee’ah terminology it means going out of obedience (i.e., transgressing
the bounds of obedience). 

With regard to the meaning of the hadeeth: Insulting a Muslim
for no reason is haraam according to the consensus of the ummah, so the one
who does that is a faasiq as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah
be upon him) said. 

Sharh Muslim, 2/53, 54. 
We advise you to
continue advising her, and if that is via your brother, that will be better.
Tell him of the Islamic rulings on what she is doing, and encourage him to
guide her by whatever means he can. 

We do not advise you to sit with her unless she repents and
turns back to her Lord. We fear that you may react towards her, and we fear
that she may increase in sin every time she sees you or sits with you. 

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“And when you (Muhammad) see those who engage in a false
conversation about Our Verses (of the Qur’aan) by mocking at them, stay away
from them till they turn to another topic. And if Shaytaan (Satan) causes
you to forget, then after the remembrance sit not you in the company of
those people who are the Zaalimoon (polytheists and wrongdoers)”

[al-An’aam 6:68]
But if you speak to her
and do not shun her, that may be more beneficial for her because it may
soften her heart. You can limit it to greeting and welcoming her, and asking
how she is, without indulging in any arguments with her that may lead her to
do something haraam. 

Do not forget – as well as doing what you can to advise her –
to pray that she may be guided aright. 

And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
Firstly: 

With regard to your father, you have to keep on advising him
and reminding him of what Allaah has enjoined upon him with regard to
himself and to his family. 

You have to try different methods of advising him. It may be
hard for him to hear it from you, but do not despair of reminders and
exhortations reaching him by way of your relatives or his friends. You could
also let him listen to some useful tapes. 

Secondly: 

You have to fear Allaah with regard to your husband. You
should not bring the worries of your family into your husband’s house and
place them on his shoulders, especially since he treats you well and you do
not see anything from him that upsets you. What you have to do is to
appreciate him and treat him kindly. This is what Allaah commands you to
do. 

Thirdly: 

No one is free of diseases – except those on whom Allaah has
mercy. The fact that your father likes to show off and to appear to be
better than others means that you have to be compassionate towards him, not
resent him. The fact that he has treated you badly and is still doing so
means that you should show mercy towards him, for if he dies and meets his
Lord in that state, then he will meet Him with many sins. 

Hence you and your siblings and family have to look again at
your relationship with your father and your attitude towards him, for Allaah
has commanded us to treat parents well and honour them, even if they call us
to shirk and kufr. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“But if they (both) strive with you to make you join in
worship with Me others that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them
not; but behave with them in the world kindly, and follow the path of him
who turns to Me in repentance and in obedience. Then to Me will be your
return, and I shall tell you what you used to do”

[Luqmaan 31:15]
Ibraaheem (peace be upon
him) debated with his mushrik father politely, as Allaah tells us
(interpretation of the meaning): 

“And mention in the Book (the Qur’aan) Ibraaheem
(Abraham). Verily, he was a man of truth, a Prophet.

42. When he said to his father: ‘O my father! Why do you
worship that which hears not, sees not and cannot avail you in anything?

43. ‘O my father! Verily, there has come to me of the
knowledge that which came not unto you. So follow me, I will guide you to
the Straight Path.

44. ‘O my father! Worship not Shaytaan (Satan). Verily,
Shaytaan (Satan) has been a rebel against the Most Gracious (Allaah).

45. ‘O my father! Verily, I fear lest a torment from the
Most Gracious (Allaah) should overtake you, so that you become a companion
of Shaytaan (Satan) (in the Hell-fire).’

46. He (the father) said: ‘Do you reject my gods, O
Ibraaheem (Abraham)? If you stop not (this), I will indeed stone you. So get
away from me safely (before I punish you).’

47. Ibraaheem (Abraham) said: ‘Peace be on you! I will ask
forgiveness of my Lord for you. Verily, He is unto me Ever Most Gracious’”

[Maryam 19:41-47]

Look at the etiquette of this Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) and how he addressed his mushrik father who
was threatening his Muslim son. In this there is a great lesson for those
who suffer a similar problem with their fathers. 

Fourthly: 

With regard to the grief that you feel, it should not make
you stop doing things or prevent you from doing acts of worship, or make you
fall short in doing that which Allaah has enjoined upon you, such as the
duties that Allaah has enjoined upon you towards your husband, or the duty
to call your father to Allaah. 

We advise you to recite a du’aa’ for protection, and another
for healing. 

The du’aa’ for protection is as follows: 

It was narrated from Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him)
that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to
say: “Allaahumma inni a’oodhu bika min al-hammi wa’l-hazani wa’l’ajzi
wa’l-kasali wa’l-jubni wa’l-bukhli wa dala’ il-dayn wa ghalbat al-rijaal
(O Allaah, I seek refuge with You from worry, grief, incapacity, laziness,
cowardice, miserliness, from being heavily indebt
and from being overcome by men).” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6008.  

The du’aa’ for healing is as follows: 

It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood said: The
Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“If a person who is afflicted by anxiety or sorrow says: ‘Allaahumma inni
‘abduka wa ibnu ‘abdika wa ibn ammatika naasiyati bi yadika maadin fiyya
hukmuka ‘adlun fiyya qadaa’uka as’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta
bihi nafsaka aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw anzaltahu fi kitaabika aw
asta’tharta bihi fi ‘ilm il-ghaybi ‘indaka an taj’al al-Qur’aana rabee’a
qalbi wa nooar sadri wa jalaa’a huzni wa dhahaaba hammi (O Allaah, I am
Your slave, son of Your slave, son of Your female slave, my forelock is in
Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me
is just. I ask You by every name belonging to You with which You have named
Yourself, or, or You have taught to any of Your creation, or You have
revealed in Your Book, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the Unseen
with You, that You make the Qur’aan the life of my heat and the light of my
breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety)’, then
Allaah will take away his anxiety and sorrow, and will replace it with
joy.” 

It was said: “O Messenger of Allaah, should we not learn it?”
He said: “Yes, whoever hears it should learn it.” 

Narrated by Ahmad, 3704; classed as saheeh by Shaykh
al-Albaani in al-Silsilah al-Saheehah, 199. 

And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
The way your husband’s mother has behaved is strange. How can
her son control her and make her act in this manner? But despite all that
your husband has to honour his mother as much as he can, and Allaah does not
burden any soul beyond its scope. If he can visit her when this son is not
present, that is good. If he can keep in touch with her by phone, then let
him do so, and explain to her what he feels, this is good as well. If he can
get some people to intervene, women and others, who can influence his
mother, then let him do so. And he should seek the help of Allaah and make a
lot of du’aa’. 

The fact that your husband defended himself in court and in
front of the police is also good. 

If he takes his brother who wronged him to court to stop him
from doing more harm, that is permissible, but if he bears it with patience
that is better for him. 

Trying to get your husband’s mother away from this oppressive
brother (as described in the question) is a good idea, so as to remove the
means that your brother is using to try to control the whole family. 

There is nothing wrong with you stopping visiting her for
now, until things settle down, so that you will not be harmed again as
happened before, especially since your husband’s mother is not one of your
relatives with whom you are enjoined to uphold ties and honour them. If you
do not visit her this is not regarded as disobedience or severing of family
ties. 
Yes, you will be
rewarded for visiting her and treating her kindly, if you do that sincerely
for the sake of Allaah, and this is part of treating your husband kindly,
but it is not obligatory for you to do that, especially since she is badly
behaved and has a bad attitude. And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
The basic principle concerning divorce is that it is makrooh
(disliked), as is indicated by the verse in which Allaah says
(interpretation of the meaning): 

“Those who take an oath not to have sexual relation with
their wives must wait for four months, then if they return (change their
idea in this period), verily, Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

227. And if they decide upon divorce, then Allaah is
All-Hearer, All-Knower”

[al-Baqarah 2:226] 

In relation to changing their minds He said “Oft-Forgiving,
Most Merciful” and in relation to divorce He said “All-Hearer,
All-Knower”. This indicates a kind of warning, which in turn indicates
that divorce is disliked by Allaah (makrooh).  

But there may be some cases in which divorce is inevitable,
and even essential. In the case which you mention, divorce may be the
appropriate solution, because it is unthinkable that a wife would treat her
husband in such a bad way as you describe in your question. A woman could
say or do something to offend her husband, but to be constantly ungrateful
is very strange.  

But before divorce, you have to try to reconcile first, and
put up with the woman. If she has some bad characteristics, you will also
find some good qualities, so you can put up with the bad characteristics
because of the good ones. 

See questions no. 20044
and 2076. 

If you can get some relatives involved to solve the problem,
then do so, as an act of mercy to this poor girl who will suffer – no matter
what the situation – from the bitterness of separation and the break-up of
the family. 

If divorce is the final solution, and you have exhausted all
possible solutions, then pray istikhaarah (asking for guidance) and consult
others, and put your trust in Allaah. 

With regard to the matters that she has referred to the
court, this may be a request to the qaadi (judge) to compel the husband to
divorce her by talaaq or it may be khula’, depending on the situation. If
she is going to give the husband some money or return the mahr to him in
return for getting a divorce, then this is khula’; if she is not going to
pay anything then this is talaaq, if it takes place. 

With regard to custody, the basic principle is that the
mother has more right to custody, so long as there is no impediment to that.
If there is any impediment, such as the mother marrying someone who is a
stranger (non-mahram) to the child, or the mother’s character or attitude is
bad, then custody passes to the mother’s mother according to the majority.
If the mother’s mother is the same (i.e., of bad character etc) then custody
passes to the father. Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah was of the view that in
the case of a dispute between the mother’s mother and the father, custody
should be given to the father, because he is closer to the child. This view
was also favoured by Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen in his commentary on the chapter
on custody in Zaad al-Mustaqni’. We have already discussed this in
detail in question no. 5234,
9463,
8189, and
21516. And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
Firstly: 

You should note that the shaytaan is extremely keen to cause
division between a man and his wife. It is narrated in a saheeh report that
the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Iblees
places his throne on the water, then he sends out his troops, and those who
are the closest in status to him are those who cause the most tribulation
(fitnah). One of them comes and says, ‘I did such and such,’ and he says,
‘You have not done anything.’ Then one of them comes and says, ‘I did not
leave him alone until I caused division between him and his wife.’ Then he
brings him close to him and says, ‘How good you are.’” Narrated by Muslim,
5023. 

In order for the shaytaan to reach this objective of his,
there are many methods he uses to reach a man, one of which is creating
doubt about his wife’s chastity. 

Secondly: 

You should also note that the fact that a woman does not
bleed the first time she has intercourse does not necessarily mean that the
woman has been unchaste, because the hymen may be elastic and there is no
bleeding when intercourse takes place, as has been stated by doctors.  

It may also be broken for many reasons other than
intercourse, such as sports, jumping and so on. 

Moreover, the blood that is usually expected may be only one
or two drops, and this blood may come out mixed with other secretions, so
the man does not see it because it is not visible. 

For all of these reasons and others, it is not permissible
for a man to doubt his wife’s chastity because she does not bleed when he
first has intercourse with her. The fact that there is no bleeding does not
mean that she is not chaste, just as the presence of bleeding does not mean
that she is chaste, because some women have surgery to repair the hymen. 

If your wife is a chaste woman and is religiously committed
and of good character, then you should not let the shaytaan have any way of
getting to you and spoiling your life. Seek refuge with Allaah from the
accursed shaytaan, and do not doubt your wife without any clear proof. 

May Allaah bless you both, and join you together in goodness,
and divert the plot of the shaytaan away from you. 

See also the answer to question no.
40278 for more
information. 

And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
Firstly: 

You should praise Allaah for having guided you and brought
you back to Him. You have to observe the fasts that Allaah has enjoined upon
you, even if your father dislikes that, because there is no obedience to any
created being if it involves disobedience towards the Creator. 

Secondly: 

You say that you feel ill and that you suffer from anaemia
and allergies. In that case you have to refer to a trustworthy doctor and
ask him whether fasting is harmful for you or not, and whether there is any
hope of a recovery from this disease or not. If fasting will harm you
because of this sickness, or will make the sickness worse, or delay
recovery, or make it very hard for you to fast, then Allaah has made things
easy for you and has allowed you not to fast. So you should not fast, and
you should make up the days that you do not fast after you recover, in sha
Allaah. 

But if this sickness is ongoing and there is no hope of
making up the fasts, then do not fast, and you have to feed one poor person
for each day that you do not fast. See question no.
12488. 

Thirdly: 

The father has to look after his family properly, and tell
them to do what is enjoined upon them and not to do that which is forbidden.
If he falls short in that then he is exposed to divine wrath and punishment.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“O you who believe! Ward
off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and
stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey
not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allaah, but do that
which they are commanded”

[al-Tahraam 66:6]

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: “There is no person whom Allaah appoints in charge of others and he
dies having betrayed his charges, but Allaah will forbid Paradise to him.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6731; Muslim, 142. 

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said: “Each of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock… The
man is the shepherd of his family and is responsible for his flock…”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 844; Muslim, 3408. Each person who was in a
position of authority and responsibility – including fathers – will be
questioned as to whether he did what was required of him, or not? 

It is well known that blessings and reward will result from
this questioning, if he did what was required of him, and that he will
deserve to be punished if he was careless and negligent. We ask Allaah to
keep us safe and sound. 

If the father’s negligence is compounded by his having
forbidden his family to do good things or things that are obligatory, then
his sin will be even greater. Allaah has told us that this is the
characteristic of the hypocrites and evildoers, who enjoin evil and forbid
good. He says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“The hypocrites, men and
women, are one from another; they enjoin (on the people) Al-Munkar (i.e.
disbelief and polytheism of all kinds and all that Islam has forbidden), and
forbid (people) from Al-Ma‘roof (i.e. Islamic Monotheism and all that Islam
orders one to do), and they close their hands [from giving (spending in
Allaah’s Cause) alms]. They have forgotten Allaah, so He has forgotten them.
Verily, the hypocrites are the Faasiqoon (rebellious, disobedient to
Allaah)”

[al-Tawbah 9:67]

You have to be patient and seek reward, and continue to
advise your father. Seek the help of righteous people among your family and
relatives in doing so, and pray for him to be guided aright. 

You should beware of staying outside the home when there is
no need, because of the harm and fitnah (temptation) that may result from
that. If you need to go out, or are forced to do so, then you should observe
correct shar’i hijaab. In question no.
6991 you can
find out the conditions of correct shar’i hijaab. 

We ask Allaah to protect You and to guide your father to the
right way. 

And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
Letting the beard grow is obligatory according to sharee’ah,
and shaving it is haraam. In the answer to question no.
1189 we have stated the ruling on
shaving the beard, and that shaving it is a haraam action. 

Ibn Hazm (may Allaah have mercy on him) narrated that the
scholars are unanimously agreed that it is not permissible to shave the
beard. 

Al-Muhalla, 2/189 
With regard to shaving
it for fear of persecution or exposure to harm, this fear is not all of one
level.  In some cases it may be what is likely to happen, and in other cases
it may be imaginary, and in yet others it may be six of one and half a dozen
of the other.  

It is not permissible for him to shave his beard or trim it
except in cases where harm is likely to result, and it is not permissible in
any other situation. 

This comes under the heading of cases of necessity. Allaah
says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“But if one is forced by necessity without willful
disobedience nor transgressing due limits, then there is no sin on him.
Truly, Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful”

[al-Baqarah 2:173]

Or in cases of compulsion. Allaah says (interpretation of the
meaning): 

“Whoever disbelieved in Allaah after his belief, except
him who is forced thereto and whose heart is at rest with Faith; but such as
open their breasts to disbelief, on them is wrath from Allaah, and theirs
will be a great torment”

[al-Nahl 16:106]

Force or compulsion means that he will be harmed if he does
not shave it. As for simply experiencing some annoyance or questions or
investigation, these are things from which those who do shave their beards
are not necessarily safe, so that does not mean that a person is permitted
to fall into sin. 

In cases of compulsion, there are conditions which must be
met in order for it to be permissible for a Muslim to be granted the
concession of doing or saying something that is haraam. Understanding what
these conditions are is very important, because many people are claiming
that they are forced to do things when that is not the case. 

Ibn Qudaamah said: 

The conditions of compulsion include three things: 

1 – That the one who is trying to force you has power to
cause harm

2 – That he thinks it most likely that the threat will be
carried out if he does not do what is being demanded of him

3 – That the harm be severe, such as being killed, beaten
severely, tied up or imprisoned for a lengthy period. As for being insulted
or cursed, this is not compulsion, and neither is taking a small amount of
wealth. 

If the person is of low status, a little harm may not be
compulsion in his case, unlike those of high position for whom a little harm
may be a humiliation and it is like a severe beating for someone else who is
of lower status.
If there is a threat of
torturing his child, this is not compulsion, because the harm is being
directed at someone else. But it is more likely that this is compulsion,
because that is worse for him than taking his wealth; that threat (to take
his wealth) is compulsion, so the same applies here. 

Al-Mughni, 7/292 

If the harm can be warded off by trimming the beard, then he
should not shave it off, rather it is sufficient to trim it, because shaving
is worse than trimming. It should be noted that a person should have the
need to undertake this journey to that country. But if there is no need for
that then it is not permissible to shave his beard for the sake of
travelling, because he is not being forced to do that. 

And Allaah knows best.

Praise be to Allah.
Our sister, may Allaah grant you relief from your distress,
make things easier for you, and guide you to that which is good. 

One of the decrees of Allaah is that He tests His slaves in
this world to see if they are patient and content (with His decree). 

“Great rewards come from great tests. When Allaah loves
people, He tests them, and whoever accepts that earns Allaah’s pleasure, and
whoever is angry with that earns Allaah’s wrath.” 

(Hadeeth narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2396; classed as hasan by
al-Albaani in al-Silsilah al-Saheehah, 146). 

So be patient and seek reward. 

With regard to what you mention about your husband, it is
regrettable. He has committed three haraam actions: 

1 – Not spending on you and your children. The husband is
commanded to spend on his wife and children. If he fails to do that then the
wife has the right to refer the matter to the court, and she may also ask
for divorce. 

2 – His neglecting to look after his household and children
is a sin on him, even if he claims that this is for the sake of da’wah,
because his soul has a right over him, and his wife has a right over him,
and his Lord has a right over him. He must give each of them his right. The
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) regarded neglect of
those who are under one’s care as a sin, and he (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: “It is sufficient sin for a man to neglect those
whom he supports.” Narrated by Abu Dawood, 1692; classed as hasan by
al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 1484. 

Raising children and looking after them and the house is a
trust that rests on the father’s shoulders. The Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Each of you is a shepherd
and each of you is responsible for his flock… the man is the shepherd of his
household and is responsible for his flock.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 893;
Muslim, 1829. 

Please see also questions no.
20064 and
45359. 

3 – Taking drugs is a haraam action, and indeed is a major
sin. It corrupts a person’s religious commitment and his worldly interests,
as well as damaging the body and mind, wasting money, and destroying honour.
It includes all kinds of evil. 

So beware of opening the door to it and falling in its trap. 

How many households has it destroyed, how many people has it
killed, how many blessings has it ruined, how much calamity has it brought
about! 

When people fall into the trap of drugs, hardly any are saved
therefrom, except those upon whom Allaah bestows His mercy and guidance. 

With regard to your desire for divorce, if your husband is
sincere in his repentance and truly regrets what he has done, and is
determined to reform himself, and if you still want him, then be patient and
seek reward for staying with him. Perhaps Allaah will reform him, especially
if he has asked you to stay with him and to wait for him. The fact that you
have children together may also make you think more carefully before you ask
for a divorce, because it is better for children to be raised with both
their father and their mother than for them to be raised by one parent
only. 

If the man is sincere in his repentance and his regret (of
the past), then it is better for you to be patient and to wait until he
comes out of prison, because that is in his interests and in the interests
of your children, and also in your own interests. 

But if you cannot bear to be patient and to stay without a
husband for this length of time (one year), or if the man is not sincere in
his repentance, there is no sin on you in that case if you seek a divorce,
and there is nothing good in your staying with him when he is persisting in
that sin. 

You have to make a great deal of du’aa’ to Allaah, and seek
His guidance by praying istikhaarah before you take any step. For
information on how to pray istikhaarah, please see questions no.
11981 and
2217.  

May Allaah set your affairs straight and guide you both to
the Straight Path. 

And Allaah knows best.